The Evil Genie / The Wish With A Catch

Granted. Your head explodes.

I wish I went back in time and sniped ADOLF Hitler before he committed suicide.

 

Granted.

... what? you wanted me to catch that?

I wish people would use scientific discovery to their advantage instead of hating feathery dinosaurs because the jurassic park fanboys love their komodo dragons.
I enjoyed JP as much as any other person, but I still wish it had a golden-eagle looking Utahraptor instead of some scaly frog.

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Since 'Adolf' was a common name in Germany before Hitler, you kill another Adolf Hitler that was one of his cousins.


I wish people would use scientific discovery to their advantage instead of hating feathery dinosaurs because the jurassic park fanboys love their komodo dragons.
I enjoyed JP as much as any other person, but I still wish it had a golden-eagle looking Utahraptor instead of some scaly frog.

 

Granted, but now the Jurassic Park movies suck because they use feathery dinosaurs instead of cool ones.

I wish everyone would stop living

 

'everyone' refers to humans. I'm a dinosaur.


And feathery dinos are awesome.







I wish for YOU!

 

Granted but you didn't catch my wish, so I end up hating and leaving you.

I wish I could bend gravity to my will.

 

Granted. The CIA kidnaps you to make you fuck around in Russia, thus starting a nuclear war because Russia eventually found out by capturing you and torturing you.

I wish for cake.

 

Granted, but the cake is a lie

I wish for a new cat toy

 

The cat toy turns you from talking cat to normal cat so you can't ask for any more toys.

I wish to have a miniature (declawed) therizinosaurus. So floofeh!

(It's like a babeh birb)

 

The declawed therizinosaurus dies on the first week.
I wish to be a demon (*cough*)

 

Granted. I salt you to death.

I wish to die

 

Granted, but while you were dead, people found out how to revive you, so they did just that. You can't walk though. Maybe too many viruses were put into your body.
I wish for arial text on my profile page

 

Granted, but you are banned from the forums.

I wish the whole world exploded

 

Granted.

But everyone other than you found a safe place to live after the explosion, and you died from lack of oxygen.


I wish I was a narcissist

 

Granted, but...
uhm...
uh...


I wish that the default text for everything was Century Gothic.

 

Granted, but you became gothic as well.

I wish that everyone was happy except for me.

 

Granted, but they're so happy they create a cure for not being happy.


I wish I could draw what's in my head

 

Granted, but it grosses you out so much that you get sent into the hospital after fainting.
I wish for my wish to be a wish that doesn't include a meaning but still a wish.

 

Granted? however the fact that your wish is so confusing it puzzles you so much you spend the rest of you life trying to figure out what you said

I wish half life 3 was confirmed

 

Granted, But you loose controls of your limbs
i wish to have the power to animate objects, or be a vampire

 

Granted, but the army of dishwashing soap and screwdrivers revolts against your tyranny.

I wish I could be a time lord.