The Evil Genie / The Wish With A Catch

Granted, but you have 1 health and no defenses.

I wish the next person will be run over by a train that will not hit me.

 

Granted, but I'm a slime so it doesn't hurt me.

I wish I could have a better social life as I talk to no one right now...

 

Granted, but you became so popular that people assassinated you.

I wish for a horse.

 

Granted, I gave you a dead horse

I wish Hillary was still in hell

 

Granted,but that Hillary is not the Hillary you wanted to be in there.

I wish for more bookshelves.

 

Granted, but they're all full of the book "Winners Aren't Losers", by Donald Trump

I wish Donald Trump was actually punished for his crimes (Yes, he is a criminal).

 

Granted, but he'll get let out in time for the election, and there will be no media coverage.

I wish I had a grilled cheese sandwich, made with Sourdough bread cooked an hour before and then cooled, using actual cheddar cheese. Cooked to a light brown and then cut into triangles, so I may eat it with my mouth, after which it will proceed to my stomach with no ill effects.

 

Granted, but it was stolen and worth a million dollars. the police come and you are now in prison for life.

I wish for some delicious chocolate ice cream bought by me for a price of $5.99, and it gives me no negative effects.

 

Granted, but now you have to wait in a long fking line, with everyone in this thread, to get the icecream. Your also the last one in line

I wish I didn't get motion sick easily

 

Granted, you now get ebola easily.

I wish Nintendo kept making Game & Watches.

 

granted but the game and watches now cost more than you can afford

I wish to be able to bend (like in avatar the last airbender)

 

Granted, but you can only bend fish.

I wish for a thing.

 

I wish that Mojang Would remove the EULA :D

 

Granted, but you get banned from Minecraft for not answering my wish and for forgetting that Microsoft owns Minecraft now.

I wish I had an NES.

 

Granted but the thing you get is an elephant jacked up on haribo sugar free gummy bears
(btw bending fish? thats not one of the 4 elements)

I wish for a good genie

________________________________

Granted but the nes raises your power bill x10 from some problem with it's battery

 

Granted, you get a good guinie, but I'm still the evil guinie, you get Ebola, cancer, meningitis, cyst, strep, more cancer, measles, malaria, marburg, smallpox, anthrax, elephantitis, herpes, aids, gonnoriah, pneumonia, intellectual disability, stuttering, autism, pyromania, sadism, masochism, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, psychopathic and homicidal tendencies, depression, dyslexia, ADD, BOOP, bronchitis, chronic fatigue, Alzhimers, Parkinson's, ALS, osteoporosis, all forms of arthritis, no legs, influenza, radiation poisoning, debt, drug addiction, deaf, blindness, olfactory, loss of taste, no balance, severe pain, loss of a life, heart disease, heart failure, OCD, General anxiety, even more cancer, brain cancer, skin cancer, prostate cancer, all phobias, and autism, and because good guinie is still here, I make him deaf etc etc etc. Good guinie can't undo these,

I wish I can name more diseases.

 

Granted but you get those diseases.

I wish that I could go to minecon

 

Granted, the plane, bus, ship, etc crashes into an orphanage of disabled children

I wish I can dream.......

 

Granted, but the only dream you can have is a recurring one of the scariest scenario your subconscious can imagine

I wish I could use wynncrafts powers irl

 

Granted, all mages spam ice snake and meteor on you. And since its wynncraft powers, we have soul points :D

I wish my phone wasn't glitchy