SPOILER Quest Critique

tig · Dec 2, 2018

CountBurn said: ↑

what kind of fair criticism is that
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I basically just shit on everything I can and call it criticism.

Also yes, the quest is a dissapointment

the drink · Dec 2, 2018

tig said: ↑

I'm gonna do a CinemaSins style criticism on these cuz why the fuck not. Let me know if you want me to do more of the quests.

Level 1

Kings Recruit

Caravan Driver: Finally, you're awake! Everyone already went on ahead.

So why didn't you wake me up? Im sure the king is a busy guy ffs. +1 Sin

Caravan Driver: This is as far as we go, right to the border.

Why didn't you lose your memory when you crossed the border? +1

Caravan Driver: The King is waiting for you in Ragni. That gate marks the entrance to the Wynn Province, so the castle can't be too far from here.

Caravan Driver: I heard it's a dangerous road to the castle, but fortunately you're armed.

With the worst weapon of the game. +1

Caravan Driver: Sorry we couldn't take you all the way, here is a partial refund for the journey. Use it to buy yourself some armour.

+3 Emeralds and +1 Potion, I guess potions can buy armor. +1

Later...

"Hey recruit. If you free me I'll kill mobs so you can get less xp!" +1

Ragni's King: I see you've arrived safely, new recruit. Excellent, come and talk to me for debriefing.

How did he see me coming into the castle around the corner? does he have X-Ray vision? +1

Ragni's King: You must be the last recruit! Finally nice to meet you.

It's not my fault I took so long btw. +1

What did you say your name was?

Ragni's King: What a peculiar name. Anyway, welcome to the province of Wynn!

Ragni's King: This is the noble fort of Ragni, one of the oldest and most influential cities in the province!

Ragni's King: Your job as a soldier of Wynn is to stop the growth of the monsters that are ravaging the province.

Or just abuse CSST over in Gavel. +3

Ragni's King: You might want to train a little more before hand, though. Many lives are lost everyday...

But we can come back by killing what killed us right? +1

Ragni's King: ... Anyway, good luck! If you are lost, use map.wynncraft.com

This line Always makes me laugh, probs because it's advertizing a cite in a medieval style game. -2

as it is very useful if you don't know where to go.

Ragni's King: Take this 1 Ragni Teleportation Scroll too! It will bring you back here if you use it.

Of course I won't bother telling you that it uses 1 Soul Point. +1
Also this scroll doesn't stack with other Ragni scrolls and isn't accepted in Tower of Amnesia. +1

Sin Count 11
Quest Rating 8/10

Enzan's Brother

Enzan: I see you want to venture into the wilderness!

I guess walking by the front gate means I want to go into the wilderness. +1

Enzan: My name is Enzan, and I am now a retired knight. I've spent most of my life fighting for Ragni's army, just like you.

Enzan: I know how hard it must be to be a recruit at this time,

Do you though? +1

so I've got something that could help you!

Lies. +1

Well, I don't have it, but my brother does!

Admitting to your treacherous lies. +1

Enzan: Follow this road, he's at the entrance of the Nivla Forest,

I bet any random new recruit knows what the Nivla Forest is. +1

you can't miss him. Just head to the end of the trail, past the item identifier.

I bet any random new recruit knows what the Item Identifier is. +1

Enzan: Tell him I sent you! He can be such a jerk to strangers sometimes...

Therck: Can't you see I'm busy?

Random guy walks by* Can't you see I'm busy? +1
Hi, I'm Therk, and I'm an asshole. +1

Therck: Oh, my brother? Sorry, I didn't know.

Unless ofcourse my brother sent you +1

Therck: Why yes, I actually have something that could help you...

Therck: Take this note. Bring it to the merchant right behind you.

When facing the Nivla Forest while talking to Therck which is probs the way you are facing because that's how you approach him, the Merchant is actually to your right. +1

Therck: He owes me some favors.

He owes me enough favors to give every single player that has ever logged in some powders. +1

So, he will exchange it for a magical powder of your choice.

Therck: You can enchant your weapon and armour with it, making them much more powerful!

Therck: Now, you'll need a Powder Master to apply powders,

I bet any random new recruit knows what the Powder Master is. +1

but there's one at the end of the forest...

He's actually closer to the middle. +1

Therck: So... eh, you can't miss him.

Yes you can. +1

You're probably headed through the Nivla Forest now, aren't you?

No. +1

Therck: It's a bit dangerous, but the big city of Detlas is past there, so good luck going through!

Ugh 2 Step quests +2

Sin Count 17 How did I get 17 sins from a 2 step quest?
Quest Rating 2/10

Level 2

Poisoning the Pest

Farmer Cevalus: Ah, looks like a fresh recruit!

What if I'm not actually new? +1

Farmer Cevalus: Good to see the army growing again. About time someone in the army had time for us citizens.

You sound like a dick. +1

Farmer Cevalus: We have to fight the corruption too you know!

Come talk to me when you leave your farmlife behind and start risking your life while constantly killing undead among other things. +1
I'm also added 3 Sins right here and now cuz this guy sucks. +3

Speaking of which...

Farmer Cevalus: Recently, my dear father passed away and I buried him out back. Well, he's not there anymore, the corruption has got to his body.

Farmer Cevalus: Corruption affects different things in odd ways. It sometimes reanimates corpses and sets them against the living.

Farmer Cevalus: We can't fight him head on - We should use my fresh Corkian sprinklers to poison the pest!

You didn't think of this until now? +1 And you can't run behind hay stacks and pison water yourself? +1

I do like the early mention of Corkus tho. -3

I have a spare [1 Crate of Rat Poison] aside my house...

Farmer Cevalus: If you're able to safely make it inside my farm, my father's animated corpse may use fireballs to kill you... Yes, fireballs. Who knew my father had that in him?

As you said, corruption effects different things differently. +1

Farmer Cevalus: If you poison the water reservoir on the other side of the farm field after you enter, you can watch as the pest makes his way back to the grave!

"How do you plan on killing an army that is already dead?" -Charon +1

Now you go poison water that doesn't work for most players. +1

Farmer Cevalus: You've must have done something to irritate the pest, because it's furious and more aggressive!

I would be pretty pissed if somebody posind my water too. +1
Maybe that's what hes mad about? +1

Farmer Cevalus: Hurry and enable the sprinklers with the button near the farm's entrance before it can do any more damage!

"Hurry and risk your life to save my shitty farm plz!" +1

TPs you into the floor so that it's a pain to get out unless you do /kill* +3

Farmer Cevalus: Great job getting rid of that corrupt varmint, I can't thank you enough!

He's even a dick to his dead dad .-. +3

Farmer Cevalus: You have prevented me from entering poverty

Shit, I didn't know you where a villager. +1

and helped keep down the waves of corrupt monsters roaming this province.

Yeah this 1 mob will certianly make a huge differense in the corruption war lol. +1

Farmer Cevalus: Take this well-deserved reward for the risky actions you took today.

Sin Count, 19
Rating, 1/10

Level 4

Cook Assistant

The Cook: I can't believe what is happening to me!

The Cook: The King ordered me to bake cakes for all those new recruits!

Like, 1 cake each? Damn how fat are we? +1

The Cook: Unfortunately I don't have the ingredients to make them, and nobody sells those items in the fort!

You're a baker and you don't have eggs milk or wheat? Wtf? +1
Also there are wheat fields fucking everywhere just inside the walls. +1

The Cook: You think you could get me [2 Egg], [1 Bucket of Milk] and [3 Wheat] really quickly?

Go fetch. +3

The Cook: Great! You got all the ingredients!

The Cook: I can't thank you enough!

That's the truth. +1

Here, take these Emeralds for all your trouble.

The Cook: I also have these strange potions. I have no use for them, but I'm sure you do!

I'm pretty sure no new player gives a damn about, or even knows what the fuck mana potions do, let alone know how to use them right. +2

Fetch Quest. +5

Sin Count, 12
Rating, 1/10

Level 5

Spider Cave

Hatath: Hello there, young traveler! I can see that you are looking for a challenge.

What makes you think that? +1

Hatath: Well I got one for you. You see, I am looking for a specific plant named "Saccharum"

Hatath: I've heard that this cave may contain some!

"May contain some." +1

Unfortunately, it is infested by spiders.

So is the forest you're standing in. +1

Hatath: I am not strong enough to risk this.

The guard protecting looks strong enough. +1

Could you explore this cave and bring me [3 Saccharum] as soon as you can?

Go fetch. +3

After dying 5 times you finally get the freaking plant! +1

Hatath: Yes, this is exactly what I wanted!

Hatath: Thank you for you help. Here, take these emeralds, you deserve them.

I sure do! +1

Fetch quest. +5

Sin Count, 14
Rating, 1/10

The Fortuneteller

Jill: Oh, a Human! We don't see many of your kind around here.

Jill: I hear you people work for cheap, well I might have a little job for you.

How do you know this about me if my kind isn't around here often? +1

Jill: I'd go myself, but why would I when I can hire cheap help?

Jill: Theres a lot of green rock to be made here, so listen up.

This interpretation of emeralds annoys me. +1

Jill: One of the oldest surviving structures of the islands is rumoured to have the key to a fortune in it.

Jill: It's the stone castle just east of here, along the separation line.

Jill: I'm not sure what the "Key" is,

A key probs. +1

but be careful acquiring it, if it was easy, they key would have already been found.

But it is easy, and it hasn't been found. +1

Jill: I'll be here when you get back.

After doing a lot of useless shit to get some beans... (+1)

Jill: You're back! What did you find?

Jill: Are these...beans?

Yes. +1

Jill: Is this what you found?

Still, yes +1

No map?

No. +1

Jill: Peh! What a waste of time.

I guess it's a good thing I was the one that hat to do it .-. +1
Also, you said you didn't know what the key was anyway. +3

This isn't some Fable kid!

Beans = fable obviously. +1

If you want to read fairy tales, go to the library.

Apparently me bringing back beans means I was pretending this was a fairy tale. +1

*Asshole tells me to go to the library to go read fables cuz I brought back beans (+1)* "I should go to the library and read a fable!" +1

*Unskippable Fable* +3

Take ages to parkour up a beanstalk only to have it shrink at the very end and make you restart +1

Finally gets up the fucking beanstalk +1

Farcor: Ah, another greedy mortal has sought me to enhance their own gains.

Another mortal? Must be greedy. +1

Farcor: Well, you will be sorely disappointed.

Dissapointed by this quest? Yes. +1

I will offer you no such riches.

We'll see... +1

Farcor: If you have found your way here, you must know the story. I left Gavel eons ago.

Farcor: I know it wasn't your people who are to blame. But you had your part in the cataclysm.

Hypocritical much? +1

Farcor: I have watched Dogun's fall, the guardian of the forest sleep for a millenia

The guardian of the forest was only asleep for 200 years. +3 Sins cuz you should know this shit.

and the greed of the villagers run rampant.

Remember that somehow this is my fault. +1

Farcor: You shall receive no riches from me, only this book. It reminds me of the days before all this tragedy.

So I climbed all the way up that damn beanstalk to be treaded like shit by an asshole dragon? +1
Also, "I will give you no riches, JK I'll give you this book that you can sell for 2 LE lol." +1

View attachment 139533
+20 Sins

Sin Count, 51
Rating, 0/10

Added some more quests
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stop.

no
stop.

this is meant to be fair criticism and me ruining grian's lifes work

not cinemasins

tig · Dec 4, 2018

Oculism said: ↑

stop.

no
stop.

this is meant to be fair criticism and me ruining grian's lifes work

not cinemasins
Click to expand...

too bad, im adding more :>

RazorGuild · Dec 4, 2018

Mannn I would some knowledgeable critic to review the 1.17 dungeon quests. I love some of them but I’m mixed on some too.

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SPOILER Quest Critique

tig "Because EO parkour killed my grandma, OK???"

the drink penguin gang CHAMPION

tig "Because EO parkour killed my grandma, OK???"

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