King Of The Hill (revival)

Sounds like Fenrir the wolf. Imma go with that.
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Every last Norse god suddenly appears. They all bind up Bailwolf in unbreakable chains, leaving him only enough room to guard the hill. The Norse gods agree they should give the hill to the Olympians as a gesture of good will. I march up the hill and build a copy of Mount Olympus on the top.
The hill is now the home of all the Olympian gods, and a giant wolf guards the foot of the hill.

 

I implode myself and kill everyone. We need a new hill

 

I build a new hill, claim it, copyright it, trademark it, patent it, name it Mt. Florf, and sign legal documents that give me permanent ownership over it that cannot be transferred.

 

I 'accidentally' crash my sun chariot into the USPTO. All said legal documents burn in the fire, and the moon 'coincidentally' blocks all transmissions, so the files can't be saved online.
After the USPTO is rebuilt, I claim it as a registered trademark, giving me all rights to the hill, and name it "APOLLOISBETTERTHANARTEMIS" with my sister's permission, of course.

 

However, the documents were already saved online, so the hill still belongs to me.

 

I call up Hillary Clinton (she's a good friend of mine) and have her hide the documents in her email server. Fixed.

 

However, the documents are found while the FBI are going through the server and stored elsewhere.

 

However, I send a plague down on the FBI with my bow, and they all die before they can say anything about the documents.

 

However, a god from a different religion broke your bow, so you can't :D

 

While you two squabble I have claimed the hill

 

But I still own it due to the legal documents :D

 

due to me being a legendary hacker no you don't

 

Nah bro, see these documents? I have about 1,000 copies of these stored in 1,000 different secret bunkers nobody knows about :D

 

I still claim the hill as paper means nothing to me.

 

I hypnotize you into leaving the hill. I claim it.

 

I realize what you did and challenge you to a duel. I rig the duel so you auto lose. I claim the hill

 

Except I am an mlg pro and win. I still have the hill.

 

I summon half life three to overcome your dankness. I claim the hill

 

I summon Full Life 3. My dankness doubles yours, and the hill is now mine.

 

I summon the omnipotent Morgan Freeman to destroy your pagan self.

I claim the hill