Experiment: Protect The Sandwich

I smack you with fish for being so naughty and take the sandwich. I give it to your Mum.

 

I have no Mum so your point isn't valid and i smite you with the infinite powers of SaltedPog3 which causes multiple time rifts again. It causes everyone that is dead to be alive and everyone alive dead. Those who are immortal turn immortalithink and those mortal turn mortalithink

 

Okay...

I'm alive. I still have the sandwich as you never said you took it and give it to Polo G bc I mean he's awesome. Then I go and slap you

 

I slap you too and make you turn unconscious. I then declare you are mortal as i rekt the Star wars fandom and took down all the memers and memes about baby yoda. I then smite Polo G and take the sandwich

 

YOU DARE SMITE THE GOAT!?!?!?

Enraged, I summon the forces of rap and spit bars at you until you are so humbled you give me the sandwich. I then get the Infinity Stones and harness their power to make myself immortal and send you back in time until you are 1 day old and incapable of doing anything.

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Also, this is such a good game

 

Your pawns shouldnt be able to move tho

 

i moved them like took them and placed them to checkmaet you

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actually, when pawns are 1 year old, they are already capable of smiting a whole world so eh, i smite you to death and make myself 2000 years old (adult years) which makes me capable of destroying 2 universes at once. I then take the sandwich and destroy the stones forver and i prevent anyone from time traveling for 2000 years

 

I go to the supermarket and buy a banana, a box of frozen waffles, and a wrench. I then go to Russia and build a statue of George Washington. World War 3 then starts because of this, with Russia and Asia against the US. European countries are on both sides. I turn into a ladybug and fly to Steven Colbert’s house, where I land on his porch. I turn back into a human and knock on his door. He opens it, and I tell him that the local pizza place is on fire! We run to the local pizza place, but he sees that it isn’t on fire. I then teleport to India and sit on a bench, eating a pickle. I call your mother and ask if she wants a free plane ticket to Arkansas. I then hang up, jump 3 times, and buy a scooter. I wait for World War 3 to end while scooting around in a circle in front of the White House. After the war ends, and the treaty is signed, I scoot to your location, stopping to pick up some ice cream on the way. I get to your location and offer you one of the ice creams. I then lie on the floor and eat the other one. I then leave to get on the closest train. While on the train, I shout, “don’t eat the mustard cushion, you’ll turn into a waffle songbook!” I get off the train, go back to you, and ask you politely for the sandwich.

 

sure, for an alliance if you will. Only half tho

 

You reach for the sandwich to split between you, only to find it gone! A hired pickpocket has stolen it and brought it to my cults lair.

 

hmm i say as i march onto your lair. I the. see 2 guards and mercilessly tear them apart. I then see most of your cult grabbing knives and guns and bows and katanas and stuff. I then easily and mercilessly tear them apart, burn them, freeze them, throw them around and other brutal methods of killing. I then see you and beat you up. I then tear your head rendering you dead and take the sandwich and split it and give 1/2 of THE Sandwich to Wommby in hopes for an alliance

 

I DESTROY THE UNIVERSE AND THE MANY OTHER UNIVERSES. THERE IS NO MORE COMPETITION. YOU CANNOT BRING IT BACK. NO ONE HOLDS THE SANDWICH AND IT IS FOREVER GONE INTO THE... idk THE GAME IS OVER. GOOD JOB EVERYONE.

 

lies mortal, you cannot destroy the Pawn-Universes as they itself are life. Without them nothing would exist. Therefore, the game didn’t end and a new sandwich popped up. Turns out, it was the old sandwich but even more powerful. I grabbed hold of it to protect it mortal.

 

The sheer forces of pawn, eldritch god, and will, make it not possible to destroy the sandwich, too many have dedicated themselves and died for the sandwitch. The game cannot end. As long as there are souls willing to die for the sandwich, it will be forever so.

 

yes, a believer of the pawns. You are given mercy from the agonizing death that the pawns would have inflicted on you mortal

 

THE PAWNS HAVE DONE IT! THE SANDWICH IS OURS! NOTHING CAN STAND IN OUR WAY NOW, MORTALS!

 

I ASCEND TO GODS. I DESTROY EVERYTHING AGAIN. I DESTROY THE PAWN UNIVERSES AS WELL. YES. NOW NOTHING EXISTS. NOTHING.

 

as everything you said is a lie, everything is back to normal. The multiverse is infinite, nothing can destroy it as a whole

 

i summon the zombie captain

 

---July 24, 2021---
Universe: 2317EXC~\a
Galaxy: Penguin Galaxy 04 (PNGU)
Planet: PNGU-LAB
Coordinates: -88.785, 170.374
Time: 12:25;13.128 EST


Entry XVII​

I have been working on this invention for way longer than I anticipated. It must be an absolute warzone in the dimension the sandwich is in. I miss the good old days, where there were no universe destructions or beings of power. All that was needed was a sniper, and an incredibly cute, lovable dog. I have tried numerous times to go back to that time, but it has always failed. The multiverse must move on. Here I am, in a bunker near the south pole in a universe where no-one would ever look. This universe is the most similar universe to where the sandwich originated on that pedestal. Who would think to look here? Especially in some random seemingly uninhabitable planet. Thankfully, I have finally finished my inventions.
I use the Sandwich-Bringer to instantly teleport the sandwich to me. The pawns track the sandwich, and teleport to me shortly afterwards. They have fallen into my trap. My laboratory's "Frigid exit" is the coldest point in the universe, with a temperature of 0.001K. If the pawns experience even a tiny fraction of a newton of force, they will shatter. Thankfully, due to Newton's 3rd law, they cannot attack me without experiencing the same force in some form. I easily take the sandwich and teleport to the most desolate part of the universe. I form a white hole around the sandwich, and lock it in position so that it doesn't get shot out. Therefore, spacetime is warped so that no matter what direction you are moving in, you are moving away from the sandwich. I also station guard penguins with knockback 2.6E6754 sticks to knock any intruders back across the universe.