Comments on Profile Post by Mistrise Mystic

*Real Lazarus falls out of closet, tied up with duct tape around his snout*
*picks up phone*
"They're on to us!

YOU'RE NOT TAKING ME!

*entire team of armed dromaeosaurs throws you into a van and takes you to their secret hideout*

HAHA, I HAS C4. LATER!

You still just blew yourself up.
Now no one will EVER know the truth!
Ahahah.
Ahahahahaha!
AHAHAHAHAHHAhAHAHAHZYSKZTQLWIU

Haha! It was a ruse! That was a clone!

*Picks up phone looking out window*
"He got away..."
*looks at camera*
"...for now."

*arms nuclear warheads and sets it to your location*

Jokes on you, I have a bunker

*sends diictodon under the bunker, planting bombs inside*

Jokes on you, I'm not in the bunker

Jokes on you, I sent the warhead already.

Oops you're dead now.

Jokes on you, That was another clone. The real me is a consciousness that is uploaded into the internet and can take control of all the world's nuclear arsenal to stop my clone from dying

*uploads virus to you*

You just destroyed the internet. Good job. Also you can no longer send nukes to me. And we can't have this conversation anymore

No i didn't i just uploaded a virus
Last time I checked Cryptolocker didn't destroy the interweb#()!38)#&!_$!#(ERROR: Internet Connection lost.

Gj.

Also you fried multiple satellites,many of which control air traffic and GPS. Expact a light shower of airplanes for a few hours, after which total anarchy and the end of society will commence

Dangit
This is what I wanted to prevent
GOSH DANGIT
IF YALL WOULD'VE LISTENED TO ME THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED
LAZARUS WANTED THIS ALL ALONG TO ESTABLISH A REIGN OF SAPIENT DINOSAURS
THE FALL OF THE MAMMALS IS IMMINENT

Well you failed miserably. AND NOW THE CLONE ARMY SHALL RISE AHAHAAAAA!

But seriously, the fall of all mammalian life is imminent.

Hey, this is Lazarus, I got my computer back. I just wanted to say, thanks for destroying humanity for me. Dinosaurs will rule the land again! And we rule the air too this time!

Nahfam. I just made the Yellowstone supervolcano erupt, and brought a 10km asteriod crashing down on earth, and removed the ozone layer. NOW NO ONE SHALL LIVE

We put you in a simulation. You think these things are happening, but they're really not.

Aaaaand now we're in the matrix. Kden. I escape, and go rambo-style

RAMBO-STYLE AGAINST A NUKE M8

Gg we both die IRL