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World New Thesead

Discussion in 'General Suggestions' started by Emogla3, Nov 24, 2021.

?

shit on the streets

  1. shit on the streets

    87 vote(s)
    89.7%
  2. what no

    10 vote(s)
    10.3%
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  1. Emogla3

    Emogla3 az is bad 2: the movie VIP

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  2. Lemon

    Lemon God has forsaken me VIP+

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    Simply and eternally correct.
    The streets of Thesead should be covered, no, CAKED in shit. There is literally no reason why Thesead should just look like a clean metropolis in the middle of fuck all nowhere. It's a small mining town in a disadvantageous position, so there's likely not much trade going in, meaning that it's poorer, which also leads to it being dirtier, hence: more shit.

    I mean, put yourself in the shoes of a citizen in Thesead, if you would be so kind. A fucking gas explosion just happened in the mines and you're out of a job. Some stupid fucking fleris shitting itself means that you can't buy bread and feed your family. So, you'll be stressed and worried, that your wife and children will starve to death or that you'll have to join the bandits to even earn a living. And when you're stressed, what do you get?

    Loads and loads of shit.

    At this point, you'll be shitting yourself even harder than that fleris was. The house will be absolutely inundated with your shit somehow, even though you haven't eaten in days, and since Thesead doesn't have plumbing (the Thesead Mayor wanted to introduce plumbing but she was threatened by her son Ardulf, if she were to add toilets to the city Ardulf would report the existence of Eltom to Cinfras, the truth is that Ardulf is into that poop stuff) you're either have to wallow in shit for the rest of your days in your own house, or get rid of it somehow.

    So, you grab a bucket, at one point you used it to carry coal in and out of the mines but that's not possible anymore, and start scooping shit out of the house and off the window like you were an archeologist digging to uncover an Olmic ruin. Except you're digging through shit to uncover your 7th child who you're pretty sure has been buried under a gigantic mound of shit. Eventually, as you keep shoveling shit out of your window and onto the streets, you end up pissing off the local mafia who had been using the dark alleyway under your house as a meeting spot to sell shrooms and Elven aphrodisiacs and what not.

    The Thesead mafia bursts into your house and threatens you: stop shoveling shit out of your fucking window or your wife and children will turn into target practice.
    You agree, reluctantly, but of course the stress keeps pushing against your mind and it overwhelms you. So, not seeing any other way to escape the pain of starvation and now mafia threatening, you go back to creating mountains and mountains of shit even though again you haven't eaten in weeks. Almost as if the shit was just getting spontaneously generated in your rectum and it was getting teleported inside of you from a shit dimension of sorts, and the Shit God was looking down onto you, as if you angered it somehow.

    And the cycle continues another time: you grab a shovel and go from being a coal miner to a shit miner, throwing your smelly shit onto the alleyway, not caring about what those criminals think, because the desire to shovel shit out of the window overrides any moral and legal codes that are imposed onto you. So, again, you get in trouble with the mafia. This time, however, you've had your warning and you squandered it.

    The mob boss breaks into your house again, takes your wife and kids and takes them to Bovine-knows-where, then after some weeks they give you their bodies back: your lovely family has just been turned into fucking swiss cheese from how much those mafia pieces of (not actual) shit went monkey mode with their bows.

    Seeing the battle as lost, you decide to go out with a bang, because even though you alone can't beat the mafia, maybe the people can. You throw yourself out of the window, intent on sparing yourself the pain and uncertainty of the future. Then, fuck you remember that the street below you has been caked in so much shit that it acts as a cushion against fall damage. Oh well. Might as well go out the simple, old fashioned way at this point then.

    The people of Thesead hear about your sacrifice and turn you into a deity, a martyr, placing you atop the Pantheon of Defecation and venerating you. So, as an act of defiance against the evil mob, the people of Thesead begin shitting all over the streets, covering the entire city in shit and making it impossible to navigate both for the mafia and for the people themselves. Shitting has by now become a ritual and every citizen is forced to do it, lest they become social outcasts. Basically, the city is bombarded with shit overnight. Not being able to bear the shit and the stench, the mob packs their (not actual) shit and leaves Thesead: the city is safe, finally, and it is all thanks to you. Yet, one could only ask... At what cost?

    twitch.tv/aetherianking
     
  3. Emogla3

    Emogla3 az is bad 2: the movie VIP

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    simply and
     
  4. strikeflame5356

    strikeflame5356 what do I write here VIP

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    I absolutely agree with making Thesead look messier, but I think the trend of the wynncraft team using the same building style on every new build is still a problematic one. Rodoroc is obviously the worst case of this, both because it now looks completely different inside than outside, but also because it really removes the gravity of seeing the eldritch outlook for the first time. I think there should be much more of a focus on having different builds that were canonically build by different groups of people actually look different, otherwise the world loses a lot of it's charm. Unless they're trying to suggest that dwarven culture and by extension architecture evolved from whoever made the eldritch outlook or something, which I highly doubt.

    In short, yes, shit on the streets of thesead, ideally shit on the streets of a lot more of the supposedly badly kept towns that look completely prestine for some reason, and ideally just a general shift in the mindset of how to rebuild areas.
     
    luckeyLuuk likes this.
  5. Bwitty03

    Bwitty03 Famous Adventurer HERO

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    iirc theyre trying to suggest the opposite, that the EO is made in imitation of the architecture around the world
     
    cmosier likes this.
  6. Emogla3

    Emogla3 az is bad 2: the movie VIP

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    it doesn't make that much sense to me that a very-likely-olmic structure would have taken influence from what is right now limited to modern gavellian architecture
     
    Sg_Voltage likes this.
  7. Bwitty03

    Bwitty03 Famous Adventurer HERO

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    It does specify human architecture, so it doesn’t really apply to rodoroc, but it’s not olmic
     
  8. Emogla3

    Emogla3 az is bad 2: the movie VIP

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  9. IamFye

    IamFye Skilled Adventurer VIP

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    has anyone discussed what type of shit there should be on the trees?
     
  10. Emogla3

    Emogla3 az is bad 2: the movie VIP

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