Lore/Story Talking Mushroom and Dern

The world flashed white and black as Lari and Bak'al clashed in the emptiness of the space between realms.

Thunder rang muted in the void, bolts of energy flying past their targets and continuing infinitely into the abyss. "Jest with me no more, elf girl," sneered Bak'al.

Then, like an extinguished candle had been relit, a realm blinked into existence. Now there was a setting for their battle; a context for their struggle. It was a place not unlike the Realm of Light. Influence distorted the sky and earth. Cliffs a hue reminiscent of sulfur dominated the landscape, pointing towards the sky like the jagged teeth of some great beast.

It was Dern, the Realm of Darkness.

Contrary to its name, it was not pitch black, in the same way that the Realm of Light is not pure white. Shades of blue and gray came together in intricate swirls, giving the sky the appearance of a turbulent rapid frozen in place. Though, despite its name not being entirely literal, there were still bits of truth in the title. The realm seemed to cast a great shadow upon everything. Even if one were to light a torch, it would do little to illuminate the gray world.

The shroud of darkness was lifted for a moment when Lari shot a spell towards Bak'al's direction. The corrupted general swiftly dodged the attack, but it was clear he was at a disadvantage. Even in familiar territory, he could not hope to best Lari in one-on-one combat.

"Have you no manners, elf? Perhaps that mindless god of yours has not yet given your people the gift of politeness," Bak'al quipped.

"Ironic, coming from one such as yourself, who sets up traps and releases worms under the cover of darkness," Lari shot back. She then raised her palms towards the sky, and began reciting a complex chant. Light spilled from her, and a heavenly aura surrounded her form.

A pillar of light encircled Lari. Her eyes glowed with a determined fervor, two stars shining in the night that was the inky darkness of Dern. "I had hoped to finish you off in front of the Nexus, but I will slay you here if I must. Begone from this existence, corrupted, and may the world never again behold the pestilence that is-"

"NOW, NOW, HOLD ON. I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE PREPARING TO DO, BUT IT LOOKS DANGEROUS. I MYSELF AM FEELING QUITE UNCOMFORTABLE IN YOUR PRESENCE. WOULD YOU MIND SETTLING YOUR GRUDGES ON A LATER DATE?"

Lari and Bak'al turned their heads towards the source of the sound in synchrony. The elf glanced towards Bak'a and said, "This must be one of your friends, hm?" but the surprised expression on his face showed that he did not know who the voice belonged to either.

"LET ME INTRODUCE MYSELF. ALTHOUGH YOU MAY HAVE NOT NOTICED, BUT THAT NUMBSKULL WHO RUNS AROUND PLAYING SOLDIER WAS CARRYING MY MUSHROOM SELF IN THEIR POUCH."

The voice continued, "HOWEVER, YOU MAY BE WONDERING: HOW IN THE WORLD DID I GET HERE IF I WAS IN THAT ADVENTURER'S POUCH?"

"Is this some sort of elaborate joke? Elf girl, have you any part in this?" Bak'al demanded. "I have work to do and worlds to conquer with my legions of undead. Save the humor for later."

"SORRY SIR, BUT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO FEEL THE WRATH OF MY SIX BEEFY AND INCREDIBLY WELL-MUSCLED MUSHROOM ARMS, YOU'D BETTER KEEP QUIET AND LISTEN TO MY INTERESTING AND INTRIGUING MONOLOGUE."

Bak'al's face paled. "S-six... mushroom a-arms?... Could you be," he stuttered, "the m-mushroom that decimated my undead horde during a siege on R-Ragni?..."

"DAMN RIGHT. NOW, BACK TO MY POETIC SPEECH. AS I WAS SAYING, IT MAY BE HARD TO UNDERSTAND HOW I WAS ABLE TO GET HERE. THING IS, MY BODY IS NOT JUST THAT SINGLE MUSHROOM. FOR YEARS, MY FUNGAL THREADS HAVE SPREAD THROUGHOUT THE WORLD. I AM A SINGLE GREAT INTERCONNECTED WEB SPANNING FROM THE AHMS SKY ISLANDS TO THE JUNGLES OF WYNN. AND NOW, MY SPORES HAVE REACHED DERN."

Stunned, Lari and Bak'al stood frozen in both horror and awe.

Then, they looked each other in the eye, and came to a common agreement. The Talking Mushroom was the greatest threat to both the spread of Corruption and the influence of Orphion.

Lari shouted out a phrase in a foreign dialect. A blazing beam of light was shot towards the location of the source of the sound. Bak'al summoned several corrupteds, drawing power directly from Dern and creating creatures much more powerful than any ever seen before in Wynn.

"YOU MORONS, I TOLD YOU THAT MY MUSHROOMS ARE SIMPLY SURFACE MANIFESTATIONS OF MY BEING. I HAVE ALREADY SPREAD MY FUNGAL THREADS FOR SEVERAL HUNDRED METERS INTO THE GROUND. MY HYPHA HAS SECURED MY CONTROL OVER THE SURROUNDING AREA."

The ground shuddered. Suddenly, a massive mushroom cap erupted from the earth. It revealed six massive arms. And in the blink of an eye, before Lari and Bak'al stood a great fungal being, towering over them with the height of a century-old oak.

...

A Wynnic chant resounded throughout the area, reverberating despite there being no walls to reflect the sound. It was as if the voice was the realm itself. But, could it even be considered a voice? For the chant was silent, without words, ringing within the mind, like a telepathic message.

"Peon. You bring unto this Realm of Darkness the chosen of Light. But, such is to be expected. Willful is the elf girl who carries the name of Lari. To leap into the unknown in pursuit of a goal is only natural. And so, I ready myself to take upon the endeavor that follows your failure to end the elf before the Nexus."

Just as the Beast of Darkness finished its words, the spell it had previously chanted took hold. The air stilled, and the world came into stark relief. All became inky shadows upon the white canvas of the earth and sky.

Lari swung her arm and directed a spell towards the Dern Beast. The bolt of lightning travelled ever more faster as it sped towards its target, but as it flew it only seemed to become farther and farther from the Dern Beast.

"The realm is warped with Influence. Nothing is perceived as it truly is. To travel from here to there, one must travel twice the distance from there to here."

"OKAY MISTER DERN BEAST, WE GET IT. YOU'RE REALLY POWERFUL, RIGHT? NOW SCURRY OFF AND LET ME RESUME MY MONOLOGUE. GEEZ, WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP ON INTERRUPTING ME? AT LEAST THAT ADVENTURER FELLOW KEPT QUIET ALL THE TIME."

The Beast roared another spell. This time, the realm shattered into a thousand pieces of glass. The world was a kaleidoscope of color. Glimpses of Wynn, Gavel, and even the Nether flashed and glimmered within those broken pieces of the world. Past, present, and future formed a great mosaic.

"THAT'S IT."

And thus, the existence that was the Beast of Dern came to an end.

 

so beautiful and tear jerking

 

just imagining the mushroom using his secret seventh mushroom arm to casually crush the Dern Beast's skull, and then turning around to Bak'al and Lari to continue his monologue

i can also imagine this being canon

 

mushroom 2: electric boogaloo

 

mushroom my beloved