Lore/Story I Really Don't Know What To Think About This

Hello! Out of boredom I made a Wynncraft story! I really don't know what to think about it. Also, feedback is greatly appreciated.

(It also seems like the indentation is non-existent)

Charles could not sleep the tiniest bit on the long, repetitive ride. The wooden wheels of the carriage--which were quite broken, and had not been repaired for some time--bumped at the slightest pebble in the road, not to mention the rugged weather, which resulted in constant stops at some of the worst possible places. Charles, who came from a more wealthy family, was not used to the uncomfortable bed that was provided with the carriage, the mattress--which was merely a blanket of leather-- would not stay in place, and would always need to be readjusted.

The boy languidly lifted his head to observe his surroundings. The towering mountains reached dizzying heights, penetrating the clouds above, and the snow peaks seemed to almost be brighter than the sun. Waterfalls fell from the cliffs of the mountains, giving off waves of mist as it descended. The water splashed into a lake, where it endlessly roared and supplied fresh water to the lake, which seemed clear enough to see the undisturbed bed.

Charles had been so overwhelmed by the beauty of nature, that it had taken him several minutes before he noticed the dozing passenger next to him. The passenger was covered with a gray cloak with a hood hiding his face and donned leather gloves, which seemed to be worn from years of usage. Muffled snoring was heard from the passenger as he slept in deep slumber and a tuft of curly black hair escaped from the opening of his hood. Fortunately, Charles was kind enough to not bother the sleeping passenger and looked onward.

The caravan came to a somewhat imitating gate. The planks of the gate were unnaturally large, and the border of the gate was reinforced with a black iron frame, bolted down with giant bolts of metal. Four guards stood on either side of the gate, waiting for the caravan to arrive.

“Well? What took you so long? It’s almost midday, you should’ve made it here…” The soldier glanced at the sky, “roughly five hours ago!”

“Ah, the weather unfortunately stopped us from going fast’r,” the caravan driver looked at one of the horses, “there was a huge storm passin’ by, and the horses ‘ere can only go so far each day.”

The soldier sighed, “Alright, I’ll let you off this time, but I don’t think your boss will,” the soldier signaled a cue to the others, and they slowly--and with much effort--opened the gate.

The gate halted to a stop, and made a painful creak. Surprisingly, it did not wake the dozing passenger.

***​

“A’ight we’re here, geddup’ geddup’ no time to slumber now there’s a province to defend,” The caravan driver dismounted his horse and shook the sleeping passenger, “c’mon c’mon, there’s no time to dilly dally I’m on a time schedule here! I godda’ pick up five more recruits before this day ends!”

The passenger lazily lifted his head to get a good look at the caravan driver. He had a blue vest on and a white collared shirt underneath. His corduroy pants seemed dusted with dirt and his black hat was askew to the right.

“Alrighty I’m awake,” the recruit slid out of the caravan, still groggy from sleep, “do… do I gotta pay anything for the ride or…?”

“No, no,” Charles cut in to the conversation, saving the caravan driver from explaining the obvious, “he was already paid, good sir.”

“Yep, the gentleman’s right,” the caravan driver coughed, “now get oudda’ here, like I said before, I’m on a time schedule.”

“I thank you, good sir,” Charles dusted off his tuxedo, and clasped his gloved hands, “now I must depart, as I have important business to attend to. Have a safe journey.” Charles, with much haste, started off on the Wynnic roads.

The remaining passenger sighed, “He’s gonna get himself killed, ain’t he?”

 

One of the best stories that I have read so far on this fourm. Great job

infact, THE best.

 

Thank you! I was quite surprised because I thought that people wouldn't like Charles being the main character, as he is more of a gentleman rather than an adventurer. Basically, I tried to do something different but still try to make the story fit somehow.

 

that aspect itself is actually a good way to start.

But just want to say, if you're planning to write a full story, try to change Charles somehow.

 

More.

 

This is a freakin great story , u did give a bit to much detail at the start tho. but some people like it and who am i to judge

 

Thanks, but how is this thread not closed yet? Isn't this necroposting?

 

Lmao didnt even see the date.