Joke Roleplay Characters

Pretty simple. Make the weirdest and most illogical character you can think of and Ill pick four after a few weeks and you can all vote on the best.

 

Bob the sword
He's half lizard, half sword.
He stabs people with his sword tail.
He can also speak Belarusian, and only Belarusian, perfectly.

 

what?

 

I looked up obscure languages, and that was the first one I found.

 

A perfectly normal middle-aged man named Frank who can never put his shirt on the right way the first time.

 

I'll use the template from your rp XD

Name: Dankard the 69th, Pretty Pink Princess of Memes
Gender/Age: Attack Helicopter/420
Race: Meme
Class: Super Stoner 64
Faction: Stoners
Description: He's a Stoner with 500000000 heads, each having 69 eyes and has 420 hearts. 99% of the heads resemble that of a rubber duck, but the remaining 1% is Dr. Robotnik's face, except it has all 648376463847 colors of the rainbow on it. He had a 69-foot-long tail and is morbidly obese. He only speaks in 1337 sp33k.
Backstory: He grew up on that island where Thomas the Tank Engine takes place. When he was 69 years old, he morphed into a crocodile-monkey hybrid with chainsaws for hands that can levitate. He flew to the home of an mlg pro name Xx_l00t_xX and became her roommate (Nobody is going to get the reference). The End.
Primary Weapon: M3M3 L4UNCH3R, launches dank memes that do 1337 damage
Secondary Weapon: Waluigi Launcher, fires Waluigis that do 666 damage. Also has an attachment that shoots tacos.
Spells:
-Song of Gabe: Bork repeatedly in a harmonic fashion, dealing 1 damage.
-420 Blaze It: 420 Blaze It and give all enemies cancer. Don't do drugs, kids.
-Number One: Summon 69 clones of Robbie Rotten and deal 99999999999999999999999 damage to all enemies and allies
Starting Place: A Random Anime Convention
Other:
-He's an immortal god with an IQ of -69.

Did I... Did I win?

3/3/17 Edit: Added class

 

Name: Skree
He looks like a bug when you look at him from the back. He actually looks like John Cena.

For fighting he uses a horse by grabing his tail and swinging it around.

He likes pancakes with memes

He hates John Cena

 

Names Dave.
He's an apple and a windows computer combined.
Constantly he's fighting over himself, and his files and folders are constantly fighting with cucumbers on his desktop.
It tickles every time they fight.
He is also very stupid.

 

A human. That is all.

 

oh boy

 

heh sorry..This is the first day in a while I've been good enough to think a complete thought...

 

Name : Coffee-Man
Race : Drinkable
Class : Hot
Backstory : He was created and spilled by Jumla.
Spell : Coffee Spell : So hot and liquid that it destroy all metals.
Other : When we hit him, it go through him, it's liquid...

 

Name: Blake Black
Gender/Age: Male/16
Race: Human
Class: Emo

Personality:
Blake doesn't really care about most things. He speaks rather monotonely. Oh and well, if you haven't realized yet he is very depressed.

Appearance:
Blake is dressed in all black. He has obsidian-black hair and nails. Both hair and nails are relatively long and his hair covers half of his face.

Backstory:
At the young age of 7, Blake was cursed with crippling depression! His parents didn't want to give him Jolly Ranchers. It saddened him and he lost all faith in his family. Then he left them. Blake began wandering the province, but nobody wanted to give him Jolly Ranchers. He shunned humanity for they were idiots.

Having been meditating in a cave for a while he realised that Jolly Ranchers doesn't exist in this world and that this world actually is not real. It is just a game. He lost all faith in the world and he now thinks that nothing matters and that the developers didn't care about him or the other people in the game. If they cared, they would invent Jolly Ranchers...

Years have gone by and Blake just wanders the province spreading the curse of crippling depression.

Weapons:
His obnoxiously long fingernails.
He rarely uses them, because "Why bother?"
They deal 42 dmg.

Spoiler: Large image explaining why it is 42, because 42 is actually really depressive...

Abilities:
Depressive Aura:
Being near Blake gradually increases the chance of you yourself becoming an Emo. The effect will be even stronger if you are listening to him talking.
If the conversion is successful the target will get the personality, the "powers" and the fashion sense of Blake.

Depressive Thought:
Blake says something depressive. Everyone who hears it will throw down anything they are holding and just fall to the ground and feel like garbage...

Other:

 

wait no! That was not supposed to be posted yet! It wasn't finished XD

 

He wasn't ready!!

 

You can probably see where I am going with Blake XD

________________________________

I'll finish him some other time ^^

 

Short description
A whistling underwater zombie.

Long description
Name:Pulkis
Species:Pukmis
Residence: Ocean floor/ The Pukmis Sanctuary
Age:old
Gender: Pukmis gender
Hobbies: stealing the souls from children of pregnant women, fooling people in thinking he will help them and then touching them, transforming them into a pukmis and whisthle when he walks on land.
History: He fell out of his boat when he was whale hunting. He drowned. The salt of the sea made his face white and the crows have eaten his eyes( yes, under the water. Ask the people who invented the Pukmis.), he was now a Pukmis.
Speech: Whistling.

 

Name: ’, Destroyer of Worlds, Subjugator of Trillions, Scrouge of justice, Warhammer Enthusiast
Species: THE ELDER ONES. THEIR TRUE NAME CARRIES WITH IT A WAVE THAT WILL END THE UNIVERSE
Residence: Inner Sanctum (Not mom's basement - anyone that speaks otherwise shall be put to death)
Age: older than those nameless beasts clawing at the bottom of middle earth (they make fine pets)
Gender: YY
Hobbies: crunching on delicious souls of the falsely damned, screaming with the knowledge that they have failed, their lives were for nothing, and that they were ultimately pebbles to the one true terror.
History: He was a nice young boy.
then he ran out of jolly ranchers.

 

I kid you not I sat and laughed at this for five minutes straight