Life In The Ice Canyon (story Pt Ii)

Matt got up and walked to the door. The knocking stopped as he had got his hand around the knob.
Matt pulled the door open, there was nothing at the door.
"Look, whoever is out there, IT ISN'T FUNNY" Matt slammed the door.
Matt sat down at his desk again and began to write.
He stopped to think about what to write.
His thoughts took him outside of his house all the way to the tower of ascension, standing tall in the middle of the ice canyon.

He though some more, what is inside the tower and outside? What creatures and topics could I write about?
He thought of outside the tower and inside.
Outside the tower were 3 kinds of mobs, Glacial golems, fallen archers and dire wolves.
Dire wolves were thought to be extinct in many places but here they were so plentiful, the packs would even attack trade caravans without being provoked. Glacial golems were Icy beasts guarding the outside of the Tower of Ascension, nobody knew anything about them so Matt jotted various theories and existing facts.
He also sketched and described them.

Ring, ring, ring! it was the bell of Lusuco. A nearby town in the ice canyon. That meant that either a trade caravan was coming or somebody was coming to bring supplies and food for the people and weapons and other equipment for the sentinels.

Matt got up, and ran for the door.
He opened it as quickly as he came and ran for Lusuco.
Past the spruce trees and ice formations and past the packs of dire wolves he ran.
Soon he had ran out into the streets of Lusuco.
Nobody was in town because they were all at the caravan, Matt sprinted through Lusuco into the crowd of Ice canyon settlers and residents of Lusuco.
2 sentinels stood on top of a wagon passing down bread, apples and water.
They also passed down potatoes, fish fillets and pork cutlets.
Matt managed to get some fish fillets and cutlets. And found some potatoes and water.
The crowd soon began to clear as they had all gotten the food they needed.

Soon the entire crowd has cleared away and ran for their homes but the sentinels stood their ground.
An unusual event had occurred. A pack of dire wolves had wandered out of their territory at the same time as 15 glacial golems had wandered away from the Tower of Ascension.

6 sentinels and some merchant guards began to charge into the ranks of the enemy.
It didn't end too well, most merchant guards had been tossed aside or crushed by the glacial golems,
A sentinel ran towards one of the icy golems and struck it with his spear. The golem swung his arm at the sentinel and sent it flying towards Matt, the dead sentinel struck the ground like a meteor a broke some ice.

Matt picked up the spear to fend off the enemies, the sentinels tried their best to hold off the wolves but the golems were getting close, too close.
Matt struck a golem with the spear twice then bashed it.
The golem was low on HP but it approached to with the intention to obliterate Matt.
Matt swung his spear and landed the final blow on the golem's face. The golem collapsed onto ice and thick snow.


Matt began to bash and impale other approaching glacial golems just to the point that the sentinels had received reinforcements from other regiments.
They began to attack in the golems in pairs until an entire battalion arrived to hold off the golems.

Soon all the golems were dead.
Except for one...


End of PT II
Tell me if I need to improve anything or if I should make a PT III

 

I know I'm interested to find out what happens next, so yes make a part 3, also it may help for the next part to add more details; for example, details of the environment around the main character.

 

fielder thank you. I need ideas for a pt 3 though...

 

Good story, interesting plot. I had a glance at it albeit a short one, but one thing you can improve on is your sentence structure and other writing techniques (word choice, emotive language etc.) . Now I'm no English teacher but I have been told I'm fairly good at writing. One easy way to improve would be by starting your sentences with something other than "Matt" and "he". You could also either make the sentences longer or group them together and not have a new line for every sentence. While it is good to format it so it's not one solid wall you shouldn't make each sentence its own line.

In fact, let me re-write a bit for you.

ORIGINAL:
"Matt got up and walked to the door. The knocking stopped as he had got his hand around the knob.
Matt pulled the door open, there was nothing at the door.
"Look, whoever is out there, IT ISN'T FUNNY" Matt slammed the door.
Matt sat down at his desk again and began to write.
He stopped to think about what to write.
His thoughts took him outside of his house all the way to the tower of ascension, standing tall in the middle of the ice canyon."

NEW:
Matt stood up and tramped to the door and firmly grasped the handle, but just as he opened it the mysterious knocking ceased.
He quickly yanked open the door only to find out there was nothing there.
"Look, whoever is out there, IT ISN'T FUNNY" Matt shouted as he peered outside.
He slammed the door and proceeded to return to his desk and began to furiously scribble down notes.
He paused and pondered about the topic he was currently writing about but every thought he had pulled him outside and beyond his house to the Tower of Ascension, towering above the clouds in the center of the icy ravine.

I did this in about 5 minutes so there could be more improvement if you really thought about it.