What's The Weirdest Thing You Heard At School?

Teacher: "You guys have to do your homework!"

girl 1: "but it's so hard!"

Girl 2: "THATS WHAT SHE SAID!"

Teacher: *sigh*

 

Thank you for the kind compliment! :D

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Kinda obvious everyone has had it before.

Of course it was cold and vanilla.

I did not know you have tried BREAD before!!! OMG!!! :O

motivational...

So, so inspirational! I can feel the inspiration running through me this instant!

LOL *standing ovation*

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It's just part of life... you know what I mean...

 

*some girls trying to insult me*

me: says some joke

Girls comeback: well you know what? Your grass!

(Please note this is high school, not some Little elementary school insult)

 

It was another computer science class. We were all goofing around when we should all be working.

I was sitting at my computer with a programming window open and a steam market window open. If I were to put what was on this side of the room's monitors into a graph, it would look like this:

40% on steam
46% playing a cs go gambling game
11% playing minecraft
3% doing actual work

I am hearing loud talking and the sound of something hitting the table. I don't bother looking because sounds like that were normal. I don't listen to what the people behind me are saying but then, I hear the footsteps of my teacher who had been helping out on the other side of the room coming over to our side. *everyone minimizes tabs of games*

I turn around to see one of the kids (who looks to be in a grade older) slide across the table on his back, and with his arms and legs in the air. Sort of like if he were super man, but upside down.

I hear my teacher yell very loudly: I TURN MY BACK TO HELP SOMEONE ELSE BUT YOU CANT GO FIVE MINUTES *inhale* WITHOUT TALKING ABOUT "BIG BLACK BOOTY BITCHES" (One of the kids just realizes that he entered and tried to close minecraft but the teacher saw. The teacher then continues his rant)

EVERY DAM TIME I COME OVER HERE, YOU GUYS ARE PLAYING MINECRAFT AND DAY TRADING. YOU ARE GOING TO WORK OR GET OUT OF MY CLASS! (Teacher sends the kid who was launching himself across the tables to the office. He then spends the rest of the class muttering to himself how he doesn't get payed enough for his job.

 

"I nu get payd enuf for mah job."

 

Currently typing another story from three classes >:)

 

Poetry in school(I hate that topic)

Someone needed a word that started with the letter O.

Someone shouts "You could use awesome"

 

"I'm half Asian-half black!" -My friend, Kevin

Friend: (my name, not gonna say it), what's your name?
Me: JOHN CENA! DOO DOO DOO DOO!
Me: NEED SOME ALOE VERA FOR THAT BURNNNN?

Friend A: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose.
Friend B: Can you pick your mom's nose?
Friend A: Sure

Rival: Say "Alpha Q"
Me: "Gofa Qurself"
Rival's friends to rival: "OOOOOO YOU JUST GOT BURNED"

 

A few months ago someone tried to do some algebra. The weirdest thing about it? It was basically doing 2+1 but with 'x' on the end of both numbers...

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This happens in my 'year' a lot. My year is 'year 10'. Year 10 is 14-15 year olds. Yep.

 

I feel his pain!!

 

Well said everyone

Anyway,
Me: (we were looking in microscopes for substances): "That looks so weird!"
Friend: "DATS WHAT SHE SAID HUE!"

 

Your story sucks, so you should just go and Fuh Cough

 

"Wheres my drug dealer?" Me, in shady hall before 1st period

"No sniping each other with stuff animals" My math teacher with stuff animals in his class

"I 360 no-scoped your mom's pussy with my dick" My perverted friend Nick

"I find doors like women, I can't pull them, only push" Some random kid

Idiot: Your a dick
Me: I can't be a dick, I don't have one. Because i'm secretly a women
Idiot: Really?
Me: Nah, go burn in hell

 

This past fall, when it was about 65F outside. I was re-explaining what to do in case the fire alarms went off (every teacher in every class that day did the same thing). It was the last class of the day.
"It's cold outside! How come we have to go outside in a fire?"
"How come we have to go outside in a fire?"

 

Ifffffffff

 

There are 325 days in a year, leap years have 500.

 

Ok I went to school at lunch break I finished early I told my friend girls were having pretend sex they didn't believe me I showed them it was so funny also it was my BFF s first day at school pretty exiting. XD

 

"You people are always on your phones and talking and it gets me so f*cking pissed about it so unless you would stop spewing such utter sh*t from your mouth I will make sure you are suspended." -Our orchestra teacher

 

Everyone said I was home schooled, at school...

 

"Alex, stop talking about LeBron James and the illuminati."
-Actual quote from my math teacher