Bullshit Your Way To Victory

As the rocket falls, burning pieces of it cascade into the already-weary streets below. Along with the catastrophic tornado, the city’s residents soon find themselves trapped as flammable materials are turned into a kindling for a fire of incredible proportions. In the wake of disaster and the deaths of thousands without any reparations from the uncaring rulers responsible, a citizen “mystic” digging through the rubble performs a long-untold rite - one that parts the debris just enough to reveal the glint of an object.

The Dog-Sigilate, as the object, a small gold medallion, is later called, surely as a sardonic gesture at the hypocrisy of the city’s godlike conquerors, is discovered to quite the esoteric capabilities. Seemingly indestructible, it, for reasons unknown to even the shaman responsible for finding it, is a catalyst for inexplicable events - and towards those who harm the city’s populace, creates inexplicable consequences to every immoral plan. Promptly, you catch the effects of the virus itself after it somehow mutates, and you are rendered immobile just in time for a large piece of wind-carried debris to strike you unconscious for several days on end.

 

(are you kidding me I forfeited my message for this)

unbeknownst to you two, people who recover from the virus gain remarkable strength for a period, which I discover and use to jump so high that I land back in the City. Since you did not actually claim the City in that post, it still belongs to Endistic, who is currently incapacitated, and the people of the City recognize me as their previous ruler, deciding to make me temporary owner while the disasters continue due to my newfound strength.

 

I use some cake to host a cake party and then make a small replica of the City on top of a big cake. You get sucked into it and rule Cake City, while I rule the real city in your absence.

 

I transform myself into a snowglobe, un-melt the glass into sand, transfer my conciousness to the sand, and strike the sand with lightning. This is special sand, and disintegrates.

Everyone everywhere gets a horrible migraine due to cackling in their ears, but no one says a word. With my newfound power (which I conveniently don't elaborate on in this post), I throw a tomato at Tzel.

Now that everyone has a migraine, no one can help Tzel get rid of the stains and he gets so frustrated he resigns. The throne is empty, full of air, and therefore I rule the city.

 

Ok I have been scrubbing for one month and 22 days. However, now I finally got it out, because Uzbuz just taught me how to use minecraft commands, I now posses the powers of Yellow from Animation Versus Minecraft, with the command block staff. However the limitation is it has to be a valid syntax minecraft command command.
/Execute at Tzelofachad run RemoveStains

/setblock ThroneLocation replace ~ ~ ~ - ~ ~+2 ~ TzelofachadBlock
the Tzelofachad block is a much more powerful version of me. It spreads.

 

there is still air on the throne...

 

no, i replaced it with TzelofachadBlock. The TzelofachadBlock begins spreading...