once again i will make a fool of myself on the world wide web. you cannot stop me.

i'm Starcalled.
or Starcalledd, or Starcalleddd, depending on which usernames were already taken. twitch.tv Starcalled, i know you're out there, i just want to talk.

resident hex maniac enthusiast, resident hu tao enthusiast, resident marie enthusiast, resident bridget enthusiast, resident purah enthusiast, resident modeus enthusiast, resident evil enthusiast, resident robot enthusiast (all of them), resident baelz enthusiast, reside

proudly trans. i literally could not care less if you're any sort of -phobic, you are not worth my time to point and laugh at. cry about it, literally sob about it, break down screaming in a walmart parking lot about it. i'll be over here, living my best life with my sour patch melon gummies.

my entire personality is lgbtq, stolen humor, and bad takes filtered through 17 layers of irony. do i really believe that breath of the wild was the worst thing to happen to zelda? am i just joking?

being gay isn't a choice, it's a game and i'm winning.

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oh while you're here my gf is gonna pull for Tartaglia soon, wish her luck in getting the Hot Evil Man :)

UPDATE: SHE GOT HIM AYO

 

Welcome, young shaman! What an interesting name, "one who is called by the stars"... perhaps you are the one to save the province from the plague called the Corruption? Do you believe the blood of plants and animal can beat this chaotic force? Is your totem stronger than the Portal? Haha, don't trouble yourself with these question yet, recruit, I was just joking!

Tell me, what happened to you on your way? You arrived much later than the rest of your companions. Did the frumans try to keep you? Not that it ever happened, but who knows with these guys...

Wait... do you hear that? That's the horn! Off you go to the battle, child of the stars! The horde looks quite large, so you will surely have some undead to practice on. Stop by after the attack, we can talk more then!

*sobs in thalassophobia*

 

Ah, I'm sorry. I didn't do a very good job introducing myself. Starcalled is just an alias. A mage's True Name should never be disclosed, especially not when demons of the nether walk this plane. One slip of the tongue, and your Mind, Body, and Soul are forfeit to Corruption.

...All that to say, call me Star. To be honest, I'm starting to like the name better than the name my mom gave me.

I didn't set out to become a hero, or even a soldier. It's just the easiest way to get a travel permit to the mainland. I'm originally a researcher of Alchemy and Artifice, and specifically the study of their union. Oh, no, not that kind of Alchemy. Never touched a cauldron in my life. I hear the fumes are TERRIBLE for your lungs. I study the ancient alchemy, the search for truth, the path to perfection and divinity. I am currently attempting to catalogue and archive the effects of various Alchemical reactions on material samples influenced by extraplanar forces.

Uh, put simply, I'm taking zombies and dunking them in acid so I can see how the Corruption reacts. Don't worry, it's perfectly safe. None of- well, okay, almost none of them have escaped. Less than a dozen. Probably. I should probably go check on them.

Anyway. Once I'm satisfied with the data I've gathered, I can begin studying the various Guard Golems of Wynn, and record the differences in Composition and Enchantment between various regions. As an example, the steel golems of Ragni would freeze up and stop working if they were in Nesaak. There must be something different between them.

But you probably don't care about all that boring stuff. You're right, we've got a city to save.

For now, "Cognitio Perfectio est, per quam fiemus Divina"

 

Keeping the True Name secret is important indeed! I am not sure what could Corruption do with it though, but I don't think the risk is worth it, as much as the answer could reveal more about its nature. The Nicknames often become the primary name, often simply due to hearing it constantly. They are usually a lot more creative too. It was like that in my case, at least. And Star is a good one. Now that I think of it, it is almost daring, provocative, as you will find out later on your journey.

A "permit", good one! I am sure you had to work hard to get one, haha! So not a soldier, but a scholar! Respect for you and your kind, without you we would be already dead. Alchemy especially, many underestimate the power that comes with it. As much as a volley of fireballs makes a show, the work of an artificer looking at a horde for a few minutes before annihilating them is simply not comparable. And of course, research is invaluable as well. There have been a few breakthroughs recently, you might want to check these out.

If you are curious about the golems, you should go to Gavel, they come from there.

Oh, you are the mistaken my friend, that's exactly what I care about! As you can see, I am old and retired, and though I am still strong enough to do my job if needed, my mind shifted towards the old book. Shall I see you after attack then? I will be waiting at the tavern.

Rather would not count on the "Divine", if I were you...

 

only 17 layers of irony?

 

what if i'm phobophobic? or anatidaephobic?

 

Well, hey at least I don't have Aibohphobia.

 

cries in anatiedophobia
(nerd emoji here) it means a fear that somehow, somewhere a duck is watching your every move.

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aibophobia. WHY DOES THAT EXIST. Wait does that mean that they can't kill Bob

 

It's aibohphobia not aibophobia!
Aibohphobia, ironically, is the fear of palindromes.
Has this Llevigar Docks post just become people talking about "phobias"?