Bullshit Your Way To Victory

Luckily, I prepared for this, so your worms ate my clone instead of me. I then retreat to my secret base on Neptune and build a giant nuke, before launching it at the city. It will reach the city in 3 posts, killing whoever controls it.

 

I attach rocket boosters to the Earth, causing the nuke's trajectory to miss. Unfortunately, it has a homing mechanism, but I begin creating a nuclear bunker of equally preposterous size to the nuke. Even though control of the city and a sparse handful of worms makes building fast, the bunker won't be finished until after the next post.

 

I unexist Neptune and send you to the Boomerang Nebula. You then freeze into an ice cube and will thaw in 10 posts.
To deal with the nuke, I hurl a hurricane at it where it proceeds to blow up somewhere near Saturn.

 

I open a blackhole by using the effects caused by the Booomerang Nebula in a scientifical way, and them appear all over the world sending thousands of people (including the king of the City)and makes that everyone that has entered it goes to the Backrooms, now since people are in the backrooms I own the city

Oh wait I'm dead, forget I don't own it anymore

 

... the city doesn't have a king but ok

I use (inspect) to delete the backrooms temporarily, booting everything inside that didn't come from the backrooms back into their respective realities.

________________________________

As a side effect, many people now have found their missing keys.

 

The sight assisted worms are now ready for purchase
I expand my business to Detroit, where I hire flying shadow men for mercenary work
The shadow men will be ready in 3 posts.

 

Mardeknius "finds" their "misplaced" Bee Whistle, however I wrest it from their grasp before they have the chance to use it once more. I blow the whistle, and the bees attack what I believed to be the city. However, I am a dunce, and, as such, mistakenly send the bees to attack Detroit, where the flying shadow men are. They are stung to death (unfortunately, they were allergic), and will no longer be ready in 3 posts.

 

Can’t have anything in Detroit.
No matter, I send Detroit to Romania and instead begin development in Florida to hire alligators.
These will be ready in 2 posts.

 

I begin my studies of arcane lore. Until they are interrupted, each post will improve my maximum spellcasting power.

 

This results in you becoming a LoL player, causing you become morbidly obese and die of diabetes.

 

Though terminology switches over to "city" partway through, careful analysis of the last page and change of posts reveal that you've all been fighting over Potatomancer's castle in the Dark Realm of Ohio this entire time. Easy to see that a city might grow around it, but this means that I still control The City, and that any pending attacks would realistically be headed for the castle city instead.

 

Its not a city but one singular castle in the middle of nowhere
No one would want to build a city around it because it would immediately be gobbled up by the giant worms
Speaking of which, a giant worm “accidentally” broke free and will eat the next person to use a vowel in their post (besides me of course).

 

th thr f ths pst mngd t r_tr__n th wrn t __t _n__n_ wh ss cnsnnts n thr nxt pst.

 

Ouch.
I'm now dead, and cannot be further injured. On the plus side, I'm also no longer a LoL player, because there is grass (though dead) in Death's Realm that I successfully touched. On top of that, the worm fails to eat me and starves until it reincarnates into a harmless blade of grass.
I conjure a crystalline globe and peer into the future, discovering that if The City is attacked by any form of earthquake before the page ends, it will shudder and fall into the ocean before being overtaken by @Endistic .

 

I realized you have a terraria pfp and are therefore based, and thus revive you and give a slightly larger worm
In the month noone posted I found new Orthworms under Ohio and thus began catching and setting them up for sale
The Orthworms are in limited stock however and only 3 are available
I take one Orthworm and send to the city where it will cause an earthquake in one post

 

Unfortunately, spmorches are known for damaging matrices, so your teleportation matrix misses and puts the city on Delos. However, the city is too large, and the island flips topside as a result, casting the city into the Mediterranean. The Mediterranean is not an ocean, but I'm not the best at divination, ok?

 

Ouch, and the earthquake too. I have my figurehead leader take the fall for the disaster and be exiled before inviting to the city the greatest martial artist in the universe. With the single motion of the SEVEN-STRIKE MOUNTAIN-RAISING TECHNIQUE, the city is effortlessly lifted out of the Med, enlarging the island of Delos considerably and ensuring that there are now also ancient Greek ruins scattered about the urban buildup. After a "saving the city" parade, the martial artist is enthroned as yet my latest figurehead leader.

The massive defenses built into every building and every home (as the city is a constant warzone) ensure that the damage it took from skinny-dipping into the Med are minor. Apollo seems to approve of what we've done with his island, and his favor is what ultimately severs the thread of prophecy and ensures that @Endistic fails to automatically take the city.

 

i eat cereal

 

I copy paste the city to somewhere in Florida. The city will be known as city b
I give city b to @Endistic