Protect the Sandwich 2

Well I still have sandwich B.

I rob the trade market, and buy a massive spaceship. I then start an organized crime group based around going down from space and robbing places. Not only do I become rich enough to buy technology to either immediately kill or send any invaders back to Earth, but I also have 30,000 guards to use these.

Sandwich B is placed in one of the spaceship's seven vaults, all 30,000 guards are tasked with guarding the sandwich.

 

A wizard finds my soul in Brazil and decides He wants sandwich B. So using the darkest of magic, he implants my soul into the canyon colossus. Now having full control over it, I leap up into space and crash through the spaceships fuel tanks, which immediately combust. The entire ship’s mobility gone, I am able to tear through the spaceship until I lay hold of sandwich B. Leaping off the destroyed wreckage of the spaceship I plummet back to Brazil where I find the wizard, mad glee in his eyes. I look at the wizard, then back down at the sandwich. Suddenly, I fling the sandwich so far into the ground beneath me, it implants in the core of the earth. The wizard, filled with rage, extracts my soul from the colossus and ships it in a small box via sea skipper to Antarctica.

 

After my spaceship is destroyed, I go back to Earth in my escape pod, which is headed directly towards Brazil. After crashing down into the Earth, I meet a wizard who appears to be quite angry. In fact, it was the very wizard who helped me out in Svalbard. As he sees me, he seems to cheer up, and he tells me how he was betrayed. However, I never would betray his trust. I tell him how I united the sandwiches once and I plan to do it again. He is intrigued by this, and I offer to share possession of the sandwiches and pay him a generous sum of money.

First, I rob the trade market again and give the money to the wizard. This shows him that he can trust me. Then, I tell him where Sandwich A is. Without hesitation, he teleports us out to the edge of the universe and casts a spell to allow us to breathe. The Toxoplasmosis users would be a problem, considering my axe was destroyed with the space station, but the wizard is able to kill them all with spells, and I would be able to revive the wizard if he died. We spam teleport to where Sandwich A is, take it, and leave.

We then go back to the Solar System, specifically to the Sun. I give Sandwich A to the wizard, and tell him to blast anyone who tries to take the sandwich with the energy of the sun.

 

I use my immense astral powers (from earlier on this thread) to teleport inside the sun. As I am lava, I am not instantly disintegrated, but instead aerosolize and become plasma. I sneak up behind the Wizard and take the sandwich - the Wizard tries to blast me with the energy of the sun but it has no effect, as I am plasma. I sneak back into the sun with sandwich A inside of a dogun-crafted fireproof box. I am now in the middle of the sun with the sandwich, and I am now a cloud of energized particles as hot as the sun.
My bucket is still in my underground lair.

 

I use advanced magic to conjure an arcane field around me that prevents any fire-based damage from affecting me.

Then, I enhance this barrier with infinite breathable air and the ability to travel freely through space, and send myself straight to the Sun, which is where Sandwich A is located.

I strike a deal with the Wizard to help me obtain Sandwich A in return for keeping half of the sandwich. Additionally, I give him a powerful artifact from the portal to Dern as a token of trust.

Through the power of my barrier, both me and the Wizard cast extremely powerful water magic to slowly convert the sandwich's current owner into obsidian. Although it wasn't fully successful (as plasma works differently from lava), it was enough to get the sandwich and both of us out.

Next:

• The Wizard splits the sandwich in two and casts a spell that will prevent the sandwich from becoming whole again until both pieces are within 3 feet of each other, and three people who have obtained Sandwich A before cast a repair spell on the sandwich at the same time.
• The sandwich pieces were restored to mint condition and are no longer affected by any visual or physical change until the artifact I gave the wizard is broken. (The artifact is unbreakable unless it is brought into the void below the portal to Dern. The person who breaks the artifact will be cursed with an immortal clone of themselves that will always follow them (and clip through walls if necessary) to ruin everything for the victim, including their plans to steal the sandwich.
• I lock my half of the sandwich in my impenetrable safe which can only be opened by going through a massive gauntlet of various puzzles from Wynncraft's many quests with no "Reset" button and locking you out of the gauntlet for 30 days should you fail a puzzle or try to cheat on any of the puzzles. In addition, the sandwich is magically attached to the safe, and this magic can only be broken by opening the safe. (No teleporting the sandwich out of the safe!) Oh yeah, and a similar spell is on the safe itself that prevents it from being moved in any way (and the safe must be opened to break the spell).
• The wizard keeps his half on himself, and it is enchanted with a protection spell that teleports the sandwich to the wizard if it gets more than 10 feet away from him. (Keep in mind that the sandwich can still be altered magically). Additionally, the wizard is extremely powerful because of the artifact I gave him. The only way to weaken the wizard and break the protection spell is to destroy the artifact. Should anyone try to steal the sandwich or the artifact, they will be obliterated by various spells based on what the wizard thinks the attacker is weak against.

In the first part of my post I'm referring to you as the current owner of the sandwich btw

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I guess that means we're allies to an extent? idk ill let you decide

 

The wizard teleports me to the Northern Mariana Islands, as per my request, and my mission to acquire Sandwich B begins. I go to the Mariana trench in a submarine that I bought with money from robbing the trade market for a third time. There, I find my good pal, Harold, the absurdly long electric eel. I give him a massive drill that I built and ask him to dig down to the core of the earth and retrieve Sandwich B. When he gives Sandwich B to me, I feed him some uranium (he eats uranium) and contact the wizard.

The wizard and I meet up at the peak of some random mountain in Kyrgyzstan and with the two sandwiches reunited (or one and a half, really,) we are both granted gifts. The wizard gets a wand strong enough to perform spells more powerful than anyone could ever imagine and I get an axe trillions of times as powerful as my old axe.

I place Sandwich B in a safe at the heart of the mountain. The safe is indestructible and nothing can be teleported into or out of it. There is a dog at the top of the mountain. This dog has a sword as powerful as my old axe and is guarded by the wizard and an anti-aircraft turret. The only way to open the safe is to kill the dog.

 

My soul sits in Antarctica until a toxoplasmosis hunted player finds it and imbues it into the toxoplasmosis, making it have the power of 5 toxos combined. The player wanted Sandwich B just as much as I did, so we struck a deal. I would find a way for salted to add in a relic more powerful than toxoplasmosis, and in return, I would get Sandwich B and my regular body back. With our power combined, we instantly killed both the wizard and the dog in one attack dealing 1000000000/3 poison. Then the player launches his totem into the ground so hard it implanted in the center of the mountain right next to the safe, and casts haul. It launches us through the mountain right to the safe, wide open. The next thing I know, I’m back in my regular body with sandwich B right next to me. I immediately hack into the salted’s Minecraft account and add in a relic that deals 1000000000000000/3 poison. Then I jump off into space and yeet sandwich B into a black hole.

 

I own half of sandwich A and the wizard has the other half.

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wait did you make a typo and say Sandwich A instead of B

 

I add a wandering explosive chicken that will constantly respawn to this universe that you may or may not mention in the next posts

 

Wait the wizard has half of sandwich A?
I did not know that I should have looked at the messages closer my bad
I guess I just leave it on the ground there cuz I was after sandwich B

 

I have the other half of Sandwich A. also you can't steal both sandwiches anyways and technically 50% of a sandwich A is still a sandwich A

 

I was only going after sandwich B, not sandwich A and currently do not possess any other sandwiches. Therefore, what did I do wrong? Nothing in your last statement about sandwich A had anything to do with sandwich B and therefore does not affect it, so I don’t know what you mean.
EDIT: oh wait I just saw the typo in my post where I said Sandwich A not sandwich b my bad ima go fix it

 

yall didnt mention chorus fruit when talking about sandwich A
therefore all of your opinions are incorrect

 

wasn't the chorus fruit destroyed

edit: even then there was magic used to revert the sandwich to its original state, aka deleting the added chorus fruit

 

I have no idea whats going on, so I take both sandwiches with my potato powers and merge them together to create sandwich C. I put the sandwich on a pedestal and wait for someone to take it.

 

You broke two rules.

Sorry if I'm a bit strict with these rules. I'm just ensuring that the game runs smoothly.

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Quick recap since I realize that this has gotten a bit confusing.

Sandwich B was hidden in this reply:

Sandwich A is more confusing.
Sandwich A was hidden in this reply:

Sandwich A was split into two halves.
You may take both halves in one turn.
You may not take a half and Sandwich B in the same turn

 

Woops
I give the wizard a magic potato that gives him steroids if he eats it.

 

I decide that my defense for my half of Sandwich A is too weak, so in addition I added various level 100+ enemies in the puzzle rooms (including the Eldritch Outlook mobs/boss near the end), and dying to them counts as failing the puzzle, resulting in a 30 day cooldown.

 

Hold on

Apparently the wizard was killed while defending Sandwich B, so I use a fraction of my power to revive him. He still retains the same properties and abilities as before, except this time he is immune to attacks that would kill him in one hit.

 

I call in a favor from a criminal mastermind I previously worked with. He easily solves the puzzles as I tank the mobs using my ehp build that laughs at the weakness of The Eye's magma lasers, the build being augmented by the fact that I am now made of minecraft obsidian. He opens the safe and hands me the sandwich half, confused at why in the world I wanted merely a useless half a sandwich I cannot eat. I proceed to send the sandwich through time into an ancient, active volcano with an antimagic field and constant emp emission, shutting down magic and high tech used in attempts to get the sandwich half. There is still a way to get it, please do not injure yourselves trying potions, spells or robots.