Experiment: Protect The Sandwich

Well we’ve done it! The Sandwich is protected! No one can devise a scheme to get it. POG!

 

poggrs nobody is trying to steal it now UwU

 

I go to New York and brag about how protected the sandwich is.

 

The coffin you burried it in is the same one DIO was put in at the end of part 1 of jojo. I convinced DIO to join my side and he used his stand to pick up the sandwich, which did not inflict the curse as it is not a person. He then stops time to walks outside (he is a vampire so undead) and, since this is mid part two of jojo, puts the sandwich on top of Kars as he gets blasted into space. He freezes with the sandwich and now whoever gets the sandwich back will have to fight Kars, the ultimate life form.

 

I give Kars a puppy and they thank me for the wonderful new being they have never seen, and being so thankful for my gift they give me the Sandwich.

I use my maxed mage from D&D and make you all see different items as the sandwich and then I go and party with some Orcas and Dogs.

 

While robbing a trade market, and finding 37,211 sandwiches I notice that some trickery is going on. Then, the real sandwich falls down from space. I take it, and use my newest invention, the sandwich-bomb, to store the sandwich in a vault with 96,277,521,302,132 other identical sandwiches. However, unlike many similar previous defenses, all the fake sandwiches are actually incredibly powerful nuclear bombs that will detonate upon being touched.

 

heheh as pawns are the supreme beings of the whole multi-verse and even the whole vampire and human race and penguin race race cannot beat them, i go to the vault and touch every fake sandwich and not die as i am a supreme being without even getting a scratch, i take the real sandwich as the world crumbles apart and i shoot a tiny laser at the earth and i tp to a new planet which i won’t say and the earth dies woo

 

I go back in time to around 600AD and bomb India, preventing chess from being invented. Therefore, you, a pawn, cease to exist. Because all your actions have been reversed, this game went differently, and the sandwich is frozen inside ice right now. I get a torch and melt it, then take the sandwich and put it inside a mech suit. It is now The Mechwich. It is armed with every weapon and defense possible, controlled by the sandwich which has an IQ of 1000.

 

I don't want to.. die..
Your will to live has given you DETERMINATION!
Load Save File 102?
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Loading Save File 102...
A blinding flash of light envelops the whole Multi-Verse...
I stand there, dazed. I walk around to see if i am truly alive which is true. As i try to remember what just happened, i see you time travel to 600 A.D to bomb india, i then tp infront of you and cause an Encounter. As it is my turn i choose the FIGHT option and 1-tap you. I then prevent anyone from time traveling to india, FOREVER.
As i am successfull with beating you, i resuscitate you and ask you to be my faithful ally for the last time. No more poisons i pwomise UwU. Oh wait, since i one-tapped you, the Mechwich ceases to exist as i still have the sandwich. Gl hf on stealing the sandwich

 

Whilst you are entreating Wommby to join you, I sneakily steal the sandwich and shoot you both with my Lemon'n'limey oh god blimey 1.3 and sell the sandwich to an old man for £100,000,000,000 and buy a private island to live on with my friends, family and dog. I share out £100,000,00 between various charities and live my life in peace.

 

As i am a supreme being, i come back to my pawn entity and take the sandwich by blowing up your family and everyone you love with a death ray then bargain with the old man and only pay 200 diamonds. Now die mortal.

 

My dog...

You will suffer

Being Baby Yoda I am also immortal through the power of memes and the Star Wars fandom, so I come back to life and vibe to the Yoda Beat, which let's me use the force to find you, crush you into teeny-tiny pieces, steal the sandwich which I give to Skulduggery Pleasant and Valkryie Cain to protect. I proceed to take a nap and have some soup.

 

As i am a supreme being. I proceed to come back to life. I then blast the two weaklings out of oblivion. All that is left are small splatters of blood... yeah i also smite the Star Wars fandom to death and the meme makers? I had them sentenced to hell by infinite times. Also i took down all the baby yoda memes and bought The Mandalorian and turned it into "Ye' Darth Pawn II The Intellectual" which features me smiting all of The Mandalorian characters 365¼ days straight. You are now a mortal, MORTAL I SAY I CAN NOW EASILY DEFEAT YOU JWJSOWMSOmapwkzp0P yes i also smited you to death in your sleep. UwU

 

I use the power of the Sith to reincarnate myself as the superior chess piece - a Knight. Using my new skills I steal the sandwich and propose to you. If you accept the sandwich will be you're wedding present.

 

I warp back in time 1 second to snatch the sandwich before you can propose. I then go back in time to about 600 AD and slowly, over the course of centuries shift India to be just north of New Zealand. In 1300 AD, some Polynesian sailors discover India. Since India was shifted, chess never was able to leave the subcontinent. About 100 years earlier, penguins from New Zealand came over to India in hovercrafts. There, they helped make chess. In this new universe, chess is a lot different. There is a lot of influence from Penguin, Indian, and Polynesian culture. Specifically, what would become pawns in European Chess became boats. I put the sandwich in a super secure penguin vault and go forwards a few hundred years. In 1831, the pawns became immortal. They raided the penguin immortality vault that held the key to how penguins were immortal at the south pole. Now that the pawns are boats, they should not be able to go inland. Just in case, I hire Phil Swift to make sure that no boats enter the vault. At this time, he wasn't introduced to Flex Seal, and had no sympathy for boats. He only wanted to destroy them.

 

*laughs* pathetic i say loudly to Phil Swift as i smite him with my extremely pro god powers. I then transform all of us to the modern pawns in our universe(IRL) and casually raid the vault. We murder all of the penguins by stabbing them, teleporting them to hell/black holes, making them cannibals to eat each other, make them paranoid to kill each other bla bla bla. I then reach the vault and see you inside the vault and smite you to crispy juicy penguin meat. We feast on you bla bla and take the sandwich. Also i prevent every single being, dead or alive or neither dead or alive or both dead or alive to time travel/teleport/do anything to india with my extremely pro god powers.

 

Since the penguins are immortal, a time rift occurs. The time police forces us to play a game of chess because both of us have messed with the timeline way too much. As a pawn, you are about to get me into a checkmate in 3 turns because I'm trash at chess. When all hope appears to be lost for the superior lifeforms, the penguins, I use my ultimate strategy and launch an intercontinental ballistic missile. Using this chess strategy, I steal the sandwich, and take it to PenguinVault-377 where it is stored in a cave one space wide and 317 spaces long. There is a knight standing guard in this tunnel. No matter what the guard will be in front of you, where a pawn cannot attack.

 

You forgot something, One of the pawns promoted to a queen and eats the knight. I then unleash a gigantic wormhole to teleport us to the inside of PenguinVault-377 and steal the sandwich. We then cause another time-rift which the Time-Police Forces cannot reverse. Thus making us the supreme beings. I also smite you to death causing multiple Time-Rifts that which when removed, cause 2 more Time-Rifts

 

I lock you into an eternal chess match and the only way out is to win. However, all of your pieces are pawns, and I stop them all in a zigzag line with my pawns, making it impossible for you to win and trapping you forever. I take the sandwich and put in an alternate dimension that is impossible to enter unless you throw an emerald into the nearest wooden pressure plate

 

while you were away, i moved my pawns and checked your king. I then murder you and take the sandwich using hax and SaltedPog3