King Of The Hill (revival)

I ask you if we can share. You get confused and I spartan kick you off the hill.
It is now mine.

 

I take a sword created to slay dragons and kill you with it. I claim the hill.

 

The gods smile upon me and I am revived. I throw a 6 million ton boulder at you, this buries you and becomes the new hill. The hill is now mine.

 

I politely ask if we can share, then apologize and walk away from the hill.

 

I summon the Dark Lord Cthulhu to destroy all of you puny mortals and capture the hill for me.

 

I summon @Dank SANESSSSS to uses his hugs of death and claim the hill

 

I use my extremely deadly hugs on those that tries to claim the hill. (Those deadly hugs deals 1 damage one decilion times every 1/1.000 a second, and your defense doesn't work against this.)

 

lol

 

I use my anti-skeleton sword that costed $2500 and kill you with it. I claim the hill.

 

I call upon the power of Salted and ban you from the hill.
The hill is now mine

 

I get bored and steal the hill from myself

 

I arrive at the hill and everyone drops to their feet and worships me. I tell the worshippers to line up, and then I punt all of them at the hill.
As the worshippers roll harmlessly off the hill, I realize that did nothing. I begin to summon Azazel. My demon lord friend murders everyone, and I happily climb through the massacre and take my place on Pride Rock. Azazel watches over me, and anyone who gets within 90000 miles of the hill is instantly killed.

 

I was 90001 miles away, and I teleport in with my demon-proof armor and kill Azazel. I then kill you with a railgun. I take the hill.

 

I hit you with an EMP so your railgun doesn't work and then tallest back in time to kill you when you were a baby that teleport back and claim the hill

 

You disappear from existence due to a paradox. I am not dead because your actions were reverted since you never existed. I still have the hill.

 

Yes, but multiple futures are possible so I own the hill in at least one

 

I walk up to you and push off the hill.
I claim the hill.

 

I take over @Florfy5 and use his epiceness to kill you. I now own the hill

 

I infiltrate the minds of the monkeys that ate me and storm the hill with my army. I dangle you from a tree and claim the hill.

(Edit) I accidently quoted the wrong person, please ignore that.

 

... except it turns out the tree was part of my ent army I installed during my early hill reign! The tree turns entangles you with unbreakable vines, and soon killing you. My ent army now surrounds the hill, proclaiming dominance of the greatest person ever, Single. match.com if you want to date your supreme overlord :^)