Lore/Story Le Restaurant De Floops - A Floop Squad Tale

Spoiler: Content Warning

Content Warning: Mild swearing, mild sexual themes, death, floop squad shenanigans.

Settle down by the fire, children, and let me tell you a story of the floop squad.

It was a particularly beautiful sunny day in Ahmsord, made only prettier by the presence of 3 noble warriors and their unseen Shadow Ninja friend.

These noble warriors were:
Whimsicality, the powerful sorceress
Booniepig, the professional assassin and hitwoman.
Aura, the unstoppable archmage
and Aj, the seldom seen shadow ninja.

This powerful, fantastic four strode through Ahmsord; their very presence able to turn the heads of even the highest king, and turn heads they did. Upon the sight of the hitwoman, Boonie, a young prince, Prince Alex, knew she was special. He pushed his way through the growing crowds, trying his hardest to reach Boonie. After fighting off a particularly angry villager, who shook him angrily and demanded 'spores', Prince Alex ran over to Boonie.

"I have never seen a woman as beautiful as you, Boonie. I ask of you, will you accompany to my fathers coming ball? It would make me the happiest prince alive." Prince Alex said respectfully. Unfortunately, Boonie had heard nothing of what Prince Alex said. She simply stared at him, starstruck by his astounding appearance. As it turns out, whilst browsing tinder ironically, Boonie had seen this prince, and liked him. The sheer fact she was able to meet him at random was shocking to her, and within moments Boonie was already in love.

Meanwhile, Aj had decided to scope out the area for unseen threats, and milk the citizens for any valuable information they had. Not liking the crowds, he decided to sneak off in plain sight; he was used to not being praised like the others, and he didn't really care. Fame and popularity would just make him an easier target, and for someone well versed in the ways of stealth, he couldn't afford to make himself known. After interrogating a villager to the point of him defecating himself, Aj learnt that a new restaurant had opened up recently. Aj shoved an emerald in the villagers mouth to stop his blubbered sobs, and told him he was never there.

Aj returned to his party, only to realise he'd somehow been beaten by the sorceress Whimsicality. She'd already suggested that the group go for a meal at this new restaurant, because her pet Wybel, Bluebell, was getting hungry. Boonie immediately grabbed Prince Alex by the arm and dragged him to the location of the new restaurant, faster than any of the others could keep up with.

Once the rest of the party got to the restaurant, Aura decided to speak up, "Hey, I've worked in a restaurant like this before," She said happily, "They're a chain. I wonder if I could get a job here?" Aura quickly rushed into the restaurant, looking for the manager. Bluebell, Whimsicality's Wybel, happily bounded to one of the tables and seated itself on a chair, looking back at Whimsicality desperately. Their table already chosen, the group sat down.

Ignoring the muffled screams of Prince Alex, who had since been gagged and tied to a chair next to Boonie, Aj decided to slide a package over to Whimsicality. "I found this in Almuj's black market. I hope you can stomach it." He said, giving Whimsicality a serious look. Whimsicality opened the package, before immediately closing it again. "Those bastards! How could they do such a thing to a poor innocent creature!?" Whimsicality exclaimed, "Cutting off a Wybel paw? I'll cut off their limbs and see how they like it!"

A short while later, Aura returned to the table, dressed in a french maid's outfit and carrying a notepad. "What can I get you guys?" Aura asked happily, clearly not embarrassed at all at her new attire. "I'll have one pound of asscake!" Whimsicality roared; Bluebell attempting to roar alongside Whimsicality, but instead making a cute little Wybel mew. "Oh, and of course a kids meal for little Bluebell here." Whimsicality added, petting Bluebell. "Could I get some asscake too? Alex and I love some good asscake." Boonie asked, sensually licking the tears streaming from Alex's face as he screamed for help behind his gag. "Oh, uh, I'll just take a side of smuppet ass..." Aj said suddenly, realising he'd become entranced by Aura's stunning appearance. Before Aura could leave, however, Boonie suddenly shouted "CAN I GET THOSE FREE BREADSTICKS TOO!?" scaring most of the people in the restaurant. Aura nodded, before walking away.

After what felt like a century, Aura strutted back to the table with a platter of delicious looking food: two juicy looking asscakes, a kids meal probably stolen from McYahya's, a small plate of soft looking plushrump and a bowl of breadsticks. It was at this moment, Aj immediately stood up, taking Aura's hands and gazing longingly into her eyes, "Aura...I've felt this way for quite a while...and, I just wanted to say...I...I love you. W-Will you be my forum girlfriend?" He asked with velvety words. Aura, blushing a deep red, kindly rejected Aj's affections, "I'm sorry, Aj, but I can't reciprocate such deep feelings. I'd rather we just be friends, ok?" She said with a smile. Aj, heartbroken, slumped back into his chair; letting his head fall into the coarse pile of plushrump and sobbing. Nobody was paying attention to Aj, however, because he was being a little bitch. By the time the first cheeks of the asscakes had been devoured, Aj got up from his now wet pile of smuppet ass and left the restaurant, muttering something about life being pointless and having nothing to live for.

Aj stood over the edge of the island the restaurant, staring into the deep abyss that was Whimsicality's true inner being. He moved one foot to jump off, before bringing it back, shaking his head. It was at that moment, a small leaf flew by Aj's head. Oddly, the leaf said "Fucking kill yourself you fucking mug." which was reason enough for Aj to plunge himself into the void; becoming a part of Whimsicality's inner being.

Those that were paying attention may have heard the screams of Aj as his very existence was torn apart and added to Whimsicality. The asscakes devoured, the group paid their bill and left the restaurant; Aura quitting her job once again as she realised her outfit wasn't just a prank, and the boss actually wanted her to continually wear it. Prince Alex was unfortunately never heard from again, though some say he lives on in Booniepig's murder basement.

The End.

Spoiler: Credits

@The Void - Actor, supporter.
@Triggered Aura™ - Actor, supporter.
@BooniePig - Actor, supporter, proofreader.
@Nepeta Leijon - Actor, writer.
@Shtafjord - Supporter.

 

asscake tho

 

Question:
Does "Floop" have anything to do with my name as I am addressed as many names such as "FLUP" "FlipFlop" "Flop" "Flippers" "Flipboi" "Tem-Flip" ect.

 

Nope, the Floop Squad is a skype group.

 

Thank you

no rlly thank you for once no one has made a new nick for me its killing me pls help ;-;

 

Okay Flap.

 

This is pure gold.
@Oculus27 we've got a plot for episode three of your anime, get to it.

 

It's based on a true story, too!

 

Sorry...I furgot.

Plus it was kind of inappropriate/not PG-13

 

REJECTED.

 

BREADSTICKS! THEY WERE BREADSTICKS!
keep it PG-13.

 

i wanna see the non pg-13 version

 

My favourite part.

 

Alright, here you go:

Spoiler: Le Restaurant De Floops - A Floop Squad Tale (Dirty Version)

Spoiler: WARNING: NOT SUITIABLE FOR YOUNG AUDIENCES

Spoiler: Like seriously, back out now before it's too late. This is your last chance.

Spoiler: Le Restaurant De Floops - A Floop Squad Tale (Dirty Version)

NO.

 

banned for lying

 

10/10

you sure? It's called 50 shades of grey

 

As leader of Yahya Students guild, I am the most valuable McYahya's employee.