Fortunately, Unfortunately (3.0)

Basically, I am going to say a scenario and say "fortunately, blahblahblah". The next person to reply will say "unfortunately something bad happens" or something like that. Then it continues the chain, switching between Fortunately as Unfortunately.
RULE IS:
There is no end to the story. You cannot say "Unfortunately the main character dies the end".

Let's start.


This man found a bear in the forest.

Fortunately this man was John Cena, and he is able to fight the bear with his Superman strength.

 

Unfortunately, this isn't Russia, so he still lost

 

Fortunately the bear had a heart attack and John Cena survived.

 

Unfortunately, John Cena recieved a heart attack along with the bear

 

Fortunately John Cena knew how to spell received

 

Unfortunately, he messed up the spell, and accidently removed both of his kidneys

 

Fortunately I said the main character cannot die, therefore your statements are invalid.

 

Unfortunately although he is not dead, he still does not have any kidneys and now has trouble going to the bathroom and now has some health problems

 

Fortunately Equius is able to create robotic kidneys for him.
#homestuck

 

Unfortunately, they break after a week.

 

Fortunately there is another main character, so the story isn't over.
It just so happens that this day, July 5, 2016, is this boy's birthday.

 

Unfortunately, it isn't July 5th anymore, so nobody "likes" him anymore and John Cena becomes the main character again.

 

Fortunately america is still in july 5th and now hes the main character.

 

unfortunately, his birthday really, really sucked (and will suck for the rest of the day)

 

fortunately, he decides to play a game with 3 of his friends.

 

Unfortunately, his friends died, but not him

 

Fortunately he had insurance to cover his death

 

Unfortunately his Friends did not.

 

Fortunately he was able to create a machine that revives people

 

Unfortunately the friends revive with some.. weird stuff.