Lore/Story The Most Depressing Story Ever [not Wynn Related]

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:
The Most Depressing Story Ever Made.
And surprisingly, its only 2 and a half pages long.
Enjoy.

Spoiler

“Hey, Theo, didja hear? Yer parts - ‘dem ‘ol countrysides, as you folks woulda called ‘em - the sun be shinin there. All bright and… sun-full,” Cascus said. “Be a gud idea to visit yer familay, before ‘dat sun goes back intew ‘em cloudses,”

“Uh, no. I haven’t. I’ve been too busy here in Tenebris. I’ll be sure to visit, though,” I replied.

“Ye best huray, b’for ‘dat Maelsohm lejiun comes thru yer turf… on yer way ovah ‘der,”

“Why would the Maelsohm destroy the trail?”

“Welluh, didja hear? That Third General - the madman. He be ledin the troops thru ‘der. He be gonna be runin all da way down to the south of Perditio. He be a dangerus felowe, sick in der head,”

“I’ll be fine. It’s not that far,”

“Just be full ‘o car, kiddo,”

Those were the last words I heard from Cascus.

The next hour, I made my way down the trail out of Tenebris. Out of the Dim Capital. Out of that deathtrap.

Our definition of countryside isn’t anything like people from Primzahl or Mundi believe. It’s dark and bleak, completely flat. To the south, you can see the broken towers that rise through the rooftops in the Dim Capital. To the north, you can see the vast dome and tower that guards the sacred tree, the Burnt, and the entire Maelsohmic army. If you look towards the sky, you don’t see a sky. You see gray and black clouds that lazily move along the musty air. Well, I don’t think the clouds are even clouds; it’s all dust. The earth is covered in a thick layer of dust, like we had a blizzard. Instead of snow, we had dust.

The ‘countryside’ had plenty of farms, all very close together. Each farmhouse only had about half an acre of land. The crops were knee-deep in dust, and every time they were harvested, a government official from the Dim Capital would come by, take all the crops, and sell it to some traders to fund the war effort. And if you didn’t want to be a farmer? Too bad. The Maelsohm would randomly pick 50% of the population to be farmers annually. Luckily for me, I was the only one in my family to not be chosen as a farmer. The first in about a century. Unfortunately, I had to move closer to the south of Perditio, in Tenebris. But at least I had a choice in life.

This would be the first time in 10 years since I saw my family. They lived in a small farmhouse and had a little bit more land than most other farmers. I was scared; they say that farmers go crazy after a while. They say it’s because of the Burnt. They say it’s because of the constant surveillance. Others say it’s a conspiracy and call it a day. Hopefully my family is not that far down the insanity meter.

I knew I was nearby when I saw a single ray of light shine down on a patch of crops. I went into a sprint, determined to reach my family.

I had arrived. The ramshackle farmhouse stood before me. The front door was gone, boarded up. The main entrance seemed to be a broken ladder that led to a missing wall. All the windows were stapled with planks. The entire building was tilted, the foundation sinking into the dust. The old outhouse was gone, and a grave in its place. Grandma’s old chair was buried in the dust. The porch was completely blanketed in the gray powder.

“Home sweet home,” I whispered to myself.

I knocked on the boards and I immediately got a response.

“Who’s there?!” an unrecognizable voice said. It was grumbled and sounded like the man had a rock or two in his throat.

“It’s, uh, Theo,” I replied.

“Who?”

“Theo,”

“Speak louder, son,”

“Theo!”

“Greedo?”

“Is Mrs. Maley there?”

“Who’s that?”

“Hetre Maley. Mother of Theo Maley. Wife of Nalez Maley,” I said slowly.

“Nalez? Ahah, that’s me name! Me! Mine! I and mine!”

I realized who this man was. It was my father.

“...Dad, it’s me, Theo,”

“Come in, Greedo!”

I could hear footsteps, a clank of metal, and suddenly an axe broke through the boards. One by one, they went down.

“Greedo, it’s been so long! Your sister misses you so,” I’m not sure if my father showed any emotion. It’s hard to explain, but his wrinkled face seemed blank. “Kaiza! Get down here!”

There was no response.

“...That’s right…” my father said.

There was a moment of silence.

“W-whats right?”

“Kaiza. Kaiza left,”

“Left where?”

“She left. She’s below us now. In the Void,”

Another silence.

“...Please, dad, what’s going on?”

“Kaiza… and, your mother. They’re in the Void. They went mad! They prayed to nothing, to…”

The man stood there, speechless.

“Are they dead?”

“I believe so,”

Yet another moment of silence. It was longer this time.

“...Dad, do you want to see the sun?”

“The sun?”

“Yes, the… the sun. The big bright yellow thing,”

“...Let me grab some tea first, and then we’ll go out, okay?”

The poor man limped to the kitchen and came back with dusty water.

“Let’s go,”

 

tl;dr but liked anyway

Grammar notice: (Unless I'm the one wrong here) Where dialogue ends, you don't always use a comma. In the case of many parts of dialogue bunched up together like you have, put periods. Only when you have a describing phrase after the dialogue do you use a comma, like this sentence you had.

" 'Hetre Maley. Mother of Theo Maley. Wife of Nalez Maley,' I said slowly."

When you have a sentence like that last one, no comma is needed.

 

10/10 too tired to read the whole thing. Way to tired to translate the first 4ish dialogue.

 

I'm actually not sure how it is. I've seen different things from different books. That's just how I learned.

 

I can't be 100% sure about anything either, but first link I found (http://theeditorsblog.net/2010/12/08/punctuation-in-dialogue/) says what I said.

 

Ah. I see. I'll try and remember that from now on. Thanks!

 

Interesting!
I hate to be a literallist, but those are some hardy crops to survive a lack of sun and being choked by dust

 

It's a fantasy universe, okay? THIS IS A FREE COUNTRY, DAMNIT

 

Communist lies!