Describe A Game Badly

Pokemon:
Make animals fight until they go unconscious. And keep track of every pokemon u rekt in a cell phone.

Legend of Zelda:
Collect dolla that you spend heaps of until you can destroy this other guy.

Crashlands:
There's a bad guy, a good guy, inventory, painless deaths.

 

(Technically still a game)
Settlers of Catan: a board game where you learn life skills such as lying, theft, murder, deception, betrayal, cheating, etc.
amidoingitrite?

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There's MH fans outside of Japan? I wouldn't know; I'm stuck here.

 

Well, there is MH4U, which was pretty much designed to be an international version since MH4 wasn't.

 

*smiles*

 

Cs go: Cyka Blyat

 

Every Metroid game:
Run around in a power suit killing aliens and proceed to kill a pterodactyl looking thing

 

And the one with ZSS ?

 

FNAF4:

A child with spine problems drags his face along the floor to check through doors if the boogeyman is there and somehow his eyes bleed from the animatronics shouting at him.

 

You still run around in a power suit for 95% of the game

 

Oh yeh Xcom is suppppeerrrrrr Easy. Its easiest mode would be the INSANE mode on every game. Its Impossible ironman setup is IMPOSSIBLE.

 

Portal 2: Shoot a gun thingy at walls, while being shouted at by a toaster.

 

Mario Kart 8: The game where whether or not you win depends on the items you luck from the spinny floaty square question mark thingies that float in the middle of the road.

Race on active freeways, cruise ships, the massive gearing of a clock tower, a cliff face, and many more inspired and realistic maps!

Mario Maker: The game where 90% of the maps are trash death traps, 8% are impossible, and 2% are quality maps (good luck finding them)

Every Mainstream Pokemon game: There's a bad guy and he wants to do something stupid and potentially world ending, which usually has some dumb motive like "everyone in this world is an evil biatch so everyone must die" or "becaz the world needs more water for some reason lul."

So you, a ten year old, must enslave an animal and force it to fight you to the top of your region in like a day of play time. Whereas every other trainer spends their entire life training Pokemon, yet to still have only a level 15 Clauncher.

Be prepared for epicness, kids.

 

Grass(iOS game)

A game where you play with grass(must I say anything else?)

 

Call of Duty: You walk. Undertale. You do stuff, I guess. Minecraft: I dunno, maybe you cut trees...?

 

Call of duty, play through a storline with explosions, people, explosions, things collapsing, and some more explosions...

More explosions than a Michael Bay movie!

And then after that, go online to fight wave after waves of: Little 10 year old kids, horny little kids who want a girlfriend, and a fan base that hates infinity... (Infinite warfare)

AND THEN GO PLAY WITH ZOMBIES WHICH IS THE ONLY GOOD PART IN A LOT OF PEOPLE'S MINDS

This message was brought to you by:

MICHAEL BAY the one who made the explosion textures... what? He didn't? Well crap...

 

Overwatch: Fight for peace by fighting in public places against others who are fighting for peace.
Public places include but are not limited to
A movie theater
An ancient temple
The streets of Mexico
By trying to hold an area, only to get ulted by Hanzo. (RYUU GA WAGA TEKI GO F#%K YOURSELF!)
Or trying to escort an impossibly slow car.

 

Wynncraft: Grind. Repeat.

Dark Souls: Die. Repeat.

Animal Crossing: Continually earn 'Money' to pay off some Racoon who trapped you in a weird 'Town' full of animals / 'people'.

Senran Kagura: Estival Versus: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBS.

Little Inferno: Set stuff on fire.

Slime Rancher: Feed slimes and sell their poop.

 

Cave story: Shoot things and the final boss is a ball

Terraria: Fight stuff and the final boss is a naked gray dude

Minecraft: Fight monsters and build massive dick statues.

 

Fire Emblem : Have your closest friends get seriously wounded just so you can get some extra goodies and ditch your younger brother to do what you want to do, which makes them really mad. Go on a massive journey to see a king who ends up transforming into a slime monster / dragon, who ends up being under the control of a bigger dragon.

Pokemon : Enslave animals and have them battle each other in a fight to the death. If you win, good job, you get paid money, and your animals are healed up so they are prepared for more brutality. If you lose, you go blind and you teleport to a hospital so you can engage in more animal brutality.

BTD5 : Have monkeys pop balloons to save a town of more monkeys. All the while the monkeys end up getting higher technology than we will in 200 years and making a giant profit of cash on only bananas, to spend it all on making a golden temple of more monkeys.

Battle Nations : Go on a giant hunt for Uranium while fighting blue haired pigs, velociraptors, giant death worms, and zombies, while at the same time using forms of warfare that won't be tolerated at all in real life (like zombie control , chemical warfare , hiring thugs , training bigfoots , and using chainsaws in war)

Clash of Clans : Mine grape juice out of the ground to create people who you throw away in battle 3 minutes later to steal other people's grape juice and gold. Spend gold to make your house look a little bit better. Eventually you unlock blackberry juice, which you feed to a person and he becomes immortal. Then you can create machine guns and meteor artilleries which run on grape juice, and a flame tower which runs on blackberry juice.

Team Fortress 2 : Choose a person to control ( choices being a KFC-munching Boston brat, an unbelievably stupid WW2 veteran, a guy with mental disorders, a beer-chugging explosive maniac, a sandwich-loving fat man who has a romantic relationship with his minigun, a medic who spends more time dissecting things than healing things, a Wild Western engineer who sits back while his machines mop the floor, an Australian man who throws his piss at people, or a French spy who smokes everywhere) and fight a battle between two old men who want a pit of gravel to own.

 

Don't forget the Spiderwaspbearthings! (Yes that's their full name, spiderwasp is just a shortened version)

And I'm pretty sure Floyd stated very clearly that they ARE NOT zombies, just exposed to black nanopods

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Honestly I have not met many other people that still play it. It's really sad that Z2 gave up on it.