Lore/Story The Ancients-part 2

The unlinkely 5 heroes left the white gates of Llevigar after a day's rest. They had packed all the food they needed and were making their way towards the forest town of gelibord.
"Why can't we stop off at Olux first?" Stratus grumbled. His black chainmail clanking with every step he took
"Because the swamps are infested with ogres. I hate ogres. Everyone hates ogres." Replied Lyra
"I do hate ogres. A lot." Stratus agreed.

"Alright, we're almost to the river. It's a short walk after that, fortunately." Kyle announced. He had taken the role of the leader in this quest, although without asking, but everyone liked him as a leader. He was brave, a little mysterious and protective of his allies, as well as a skilled swordsman

"I see the river already.....wait, who is that?" Aurus shouted ahead from his horse.
Aurus was right. A man stood by the river, with a hood over his face. He wasn't very close, but even from there a cold, menacing aura shrouded him. He wore black robes with a symbol on his chest that looked like a winged orb with 3 rays of sunlight shining from beneath it. The mark of an ancient clan of mages.
"DROP YOUR WEAPON!" Stratus yelled. The man in black robes had just drawn a jagged bronze sword. He advanced towards them, his robes shifting to reveal silver armour beneath them.
Aurus fied a blast of magic from his wand. The enemy dodged, then raised his hand up in the air, fist clenched. Suddenly, 2 headless ghouls appeared by his side, carrying hammers stained with blood.
"It would be unwise to irritate my master by resisting. If you are on your way to gelibord you would have to make it past the kingdom of my leader. But you won't." His voice was like sandpaper against a metal blade, rasping and dead, not a natural sound. His skin was pure white, like the quartz from llevigar's walls.
"My name is Azrael, last surviving member of the Mage guild of dead island. What words do you want on your grave?" He asked, chuckling as he watched his enemies' fear.
"None." replied Lyra. She fired an arrow, but azrael grabbed it by the shaft mid-flight and hurled it into a rock. It stuck deep into the stone, vibrating. He stretched his hand out and telekinetically pulled Lyra's bow from her hand, throwing it behind him.
His hood fell away, revealing his monstrous face. If he was human at any point in his live, he definitely wasn't now. His face was elongated and wolfish, two slits for nostrils. Curled horns rose from the top of his head. His face, like the rest of his skin, was pure white. A second set of horns was on the side of his head, curving down then forwards like a ram's horns. His scleras were black, but his pupils glowed white with some monstrous energy. Black lines went over his eyes.

"Foolish human. I was once like you, accepted in Wynn's society. Gavel is worse. People murder their own family for money, like the greedy cowards that they are. My leader plans on changing all that. I serve Gavel's most powerful being." Azrael rasped.

"What, you mean..." Marcus the Enderman began to talk but was cut off
"SILENCE! Of course not. I didn't sell my soul like that foolish wynnic archer. Do I look like a spider-mauled coward who lives in a hive?" Azrael snapped. He clearly didn't like being associated with a certain being, although Marcus had expected this person in particular to use someone like Azrael as a pawn. Marcus prepared his thunder spear. if he was going to fight, he would make sure he did well.
"You three, you will come with me. Kill the other two." Azrael pointed at Kyle, Marcus and Lyra.
The ghouls advanced, but Aurus was quicker. He pulled out his wand and cast a spell. The world shifted around them, then all of a sudden they were away from the riverside and in a dark, ominous forest.

" Why didn't you do this before? It would have been much easier to..." Lyra was about to ask Aurus a question but he lay sprawled at her feet, knocked out cold.

"I know Azrael. At least, I know of his history. He's one of those people who we like to keep a secret, a former prince who was almost murdered by his brother. He was also a mage, researching the egg on Dead Island and had too much contact with the corruption it radiated. After his near-death, he used one of the many dark arts he learned while in that island, and transferred his soul into something else before his body gave up on him. We don't know what, but he somehow managed to cheat death and tried to ressurect his old body, and become an immortal, but his plan backfired. His body was horribly twisted the second he entered it, the dark magic turhing him into what you saw there. Enraged, he killed 20 people in Selchar when he tried to return to wynn, and was exiled to gavel because his father, the king of selchar, didn't want to see him die." Kyle spoke. He didn't say anything loudly, as if he didn't want the world to hear him.

"Yeah, yeah, that's nice. What else do you know?" Lyra demanded.

"I also know that his so called leader lives right over there, and that he's the one causing the disturbance in gavel."
Kyle pointed to a massive stone castle in the distance, rising up above the trees.
"Dullahan? You don't seriously think he's behind this. He's a slavemaster, nothing else." Aurus said, confused by Kyle's ideas.
"Who else summons headless ghouls made in their own image? Who else claimes ultimate power. Who else rules over gelibord's forest with a fist of iron? Who else always wants more?" Kyle asked.
"Yeah, you're right. It must be him." Aurus agreed.
"And I know how we're going to stop him. I have friends. Crazed, immortal spider loving friends who live somewhere in the canyon of the lost. If Dullahan's preparing for war, we need an army of our own. And I know someone who owns one." Kyle declared
"That's suicide. You may be friends with Gavel's most powerful beings but we definitely aren't." Stratus yelled.
"Risky, but not suicide. Also you have that hammer for a reason. Make them talk." Kyle said, a crazy smile across his face
"Is that how you treat friends? You get fishmen to beat them with hammers?" Lyra asked.
"No, only how I treat friends who need to step off their high horse. Come on, we're going to the Hive. Now." Kyle ordered.

Sorry about the constant typos. Enjoy!

 

Sorry, this part is written kind of badly. I rushed this part but I will make sure that the next will be better.

 

Bump time for today

 

Woah... that's good! I'd love some backstory though. I was a bit confused for some parts. (like the hammer? who these people be?) It's understandable if you're leaving it for a surprise. Also, background can sometimes be boring.

 

You need to work on better character development. You're adding tons of characters, but we know little about them.

 

Most of the characters are from previous parts. Marcus is the main character. The other 4 heroes appear at the end of part 1. Stratus, the fish/human hybrid from olux, uses a hammer and spear as weapons. Azrael is in part 2, talking ot his master (Now revealed to be Mr Dullahan's headless spirit). He has a much bigger part to play than you might expect for a simple minion. Not saying any spoilers about it though :)

 

Ohhh, didn't see the part 2 part, silly me. Could you link me to the first part?

 

Part 1: https://forums.wynncraft.com/threads/the-ancients-part-1.109195/
Prologue: https://forums.wynncraft.com/threads/the-ancients-prologue.108362/

 

I really like where this is going. One thing, the characters seem to be randomly mashed together and sent on a quest. Does Marcus have any suspicions?
Overall, it's good. It has the right amount of description and action to be interesting and engaging.